Double Dork
by Kat of Mosh Pits
Summary: Edd ends up tutoring Kevin during the summer. Eddy isn’t happy that Kevin is taking up all of Double D’s time. Edd doesn’t know what to do. Stupid PostIts.
1. Chapter 1

Summery1: "You're a damn traitor, Double D!" "But Eddy!" "Forget those dorks, Double D…."

Summery2: Edd ends up tutoring Kevin during the summer. Eddy isn't happy that Kevin is taking up all of Double D's time. Edd doesn't know what to do. Stupid Post-Its.

Warning: Ahh;;, I'm so asking for my first ever flames in writing this. This story contains Shonen ai! Which means Boy+boy! However, I'm actually doing anime version shonen ai in that you can just pretend it isn't there! So don't go too wacko. ….Until that changes to fic-shonen ai. I dunno if it will or not yet. WE SHALL SEE!

__

Notes about the story: I have no idea what brought this on. I usually stay away from American-style work because people are a lot more touchy about slash. Oo scary. But I got this great idea…and I'm running with it. Hopefully, I'll outrun those flamethrowers. This is NOT just a romance! This is about Double D, its in his pov…and, well, its hard to explain, just read.

Double Dork

Chapter 1

Have you ever saw a plot so often that it becomes cliché? You can sit in the darkened theater or turn crisp new pages and you can predict every single complication that will occur. It makes you want to strangle the author for not coming up with something original. Not to mention how boring it becomes. This is my world in the cul-de-sac. Everyday here has little variation from the day before. I get up, make my bed with the aid of my ruler to make sure every line of the sheet is exact, shower, dress, folding my dirty pajamas before putting them in the hamper, fix my breakfast, usually a banana and a bowl of Healthy Nut, wash the dishes, then do my chores. My chores are in the form of post-it notes. Sometime while I am floating in the world of REM they appear in various places throughout the house from my parents.

That is how we communicate. Post-it notes. The only time that changes is when there is something very important to say. Like moving, for example. That information came in the form of a whole sheet of white, typing paper signed by both my parents. I hate typing paper. It's so informal. So are Post-it notes, I suppose. They are a lot more of a slap-dash type of communication. "_Hi! I'm on my way out the door but that's okay because I love you enough to wait twenty seconds to stick a Post-it on the refrigerator_!" What's wrong with using normal paper? They can use little magnates to put them on the refrigerator. Maybe a smiley-face magnate when they're happy, or a banana when they're feeling silly.

With the amount of post-its copulating throughout my house it almost appears as though my parents are in competition in how many post-its in their name they can create. This morning there were 174 post-its total. Father had 80 while my Mother had the remaining 94. Father must have been in a hurry this morning to be so far behind. However, Mother is beating my Father in overall score by 64 Post-its.

This is the kind of thing I thought about before moving here. It's sad, I know. However, I had to think about something. There are only so many times I can count the number of dots on the wallpaper. I have counted them all. There were six thousand, three hundred and three and four halfs. The fraction comes from the dots that are cut off by the ceiling or floor.

Before my move I had no friends. Obviously, if I had time to count dots. I was viewed as strange and uncomfortable to be around because of the way I act and talk. I suppose a word that could have described their view of me is 'snooty.' They thought because of the way I talk, much to eloquent for my age, that I thought I was better than them. The problem with being so smart is that often shyness is mistaken for arrogance. I'm not the type of person to just walk up to the first person I see and start up a conversation.

_"Salutations good citizen! Isn't this a wonderful day for the development of some lovely cirrus cloud formation?"_

Good citizen? What am I, a cliché-d superhero? At the very least I'd be stuffed in a trashcan somewhere for talking like that. It's not like I try to sound superior. I get nervous when I talk to new people and I suppose to compensate for my lack of confidence I would end up showing off my intelligence. It's a self-esteem thing.

I packed everything neatly for the move. When the movers arrived all the boxes where organized alphabetically and by type. I was just getting ready to reorganize them again by size when the moving truck arrived. They told me they had gotten a message from my parents that they had to be in meetings all day and they were going to catch a night-train to arrive overnight. So I got to ride with the movers.

It was unnerving, but they were very kind. I suppose they felt sorry for me, having to move to a whole new town all by myself. They even offered to treat me to lunch when we took a rest-stop. I politely declined. I had made my own lunch that morning. I don't trust the food at truck-stops. The entire place is filthy, and if they don't even bother to wipe down the counters properly who knows what they do to their food. Or don't do. The thought gives me the shivers.

It was late when we finally arrived at the new house. We were all tired and they only unloaded my mattress so I could sleep on something that night. Only I didn't sleep. I spent the rest of the night measuring the house.

The movers were quite surprised to find the next morning that I knew exactly where everything should go. I felt uncomfortable giving them orders, so I had written out directions and even done a sketch of how the rooms should look. Maybe I should have used Post-it notes. Guess I'm more like my parents than I knew. While they were working I took a shopping list and tried to find the local grocery mart. I decided I needed to repay the movers for their kindness and make them lunch. I made a type of cold stew since I didn't have all the kitchen implements I needed. They liked it and even helped me unpack some of the boxes before they had to leave for their next job.

Unfortunately, the move was in the middle of summer. I don't which would be worse, moving in the middle of the school year or the middle of summer. Both times are the worst for trying to make friends and fit in. Summer would be better, I suppose, because I was able to keep myself busy for a month. Locked in my house is another way of putting it. There were lots of kids in the neighborhood. I would watch them out my window occasionally, but they all seemed to have a place, and I didn't want to intrude.

I couldn't stay in the house forever. For one thing I needed to go get groceries.

Ah, the necessary evil of living. Eating and sleeping. Both necessary but seemingly pointless. Imagine how much you could get done if you didn't have to stop for sleep or nutrition. Imagine that within the countless hours spent unconscious that during that time we could have invented Cold Fusion, or a cure for common cold! It is unfortunate.

What is also unfortunate is how I forgot to add into my calculations my self-appointed house-arrest. After remaining locked in my house for so long the idea of venturing out into the outside world was most alarming. I had not familiarized myself with my new environment, too unnerved by the thought of making a fool of myself to my fellow peers. The only landmark I knew was that of the grocery mart where I had ventured my first day to procure sustenance for the movers. At least I knew where I was going, since that was my destination this time. However, I would have to set aside time in the near future to explore my new neighborhood.

When I finally gathered enough courage to leave my house it was mid-afternoon. The trip to the grocery mart was silent. I held the grocery list tight between my hands and walked quickly, my head down. Once inside the grocery mart I felt a little more at ease. At least here I had some business.

"ED! Be quiet!" My head swiveled around automatically to the sound of my name. A girl maybe a year or two younger than me stood at the other end of the aisle yelling at the elder boy. He had to be several years older than I, given his height. Great, there was another Ed in town. That could make things awkward. Would they hate me because I had taken name from one of their own? They probably wouldn't care at all, just leaving me to my own devices. That was fine, I was used to being alone. The new house had some interesting wallpaper. The one in the dining room had a border of leaves. I could probably count how many there were. So I'm bitter, I'm allowed to be.

Throughout my mental diatribe I had not realized that I had failed to move my gaze away from the pair. The girl looked up and stared me straight in the eye. Oh my, so this is how a deer feels when it sees headlights. I blushed, grabbed the baking soda, and hurried away.

Oh good going, I thought to myself as I headed for the register. Not only have I no friends but I have successfully alienated the first kids I've come across. Eavesdropping! They must think of me as terribly rude! I could have walked up and introduced myself, could have explained that I simply heard my name and had turned around, but noo! I had to make a fool out of myself, as always.

For someone so smart I really am an idiot.

Just as I was leaving with my purchase something slammed into me, knocking me to the ground.

"What the hell!" a harsh voice yelled. I flinched.

"Ha! That's what you get, _dork_!" Not even introduced and I'm already labeled. I _love _my life.

"Hey! Say that to my face!" Wait… I didn't say that. Finally, I looked up to realize that the insult had not been directed at me. It had to be a first. Instead, there were two kids about my own age. One was on a bike, obviously the one who had declared the insult. He wore a backwards cap with a few wisps of red hair jutting out. His expression could only be generously described as perturbed as he jeering at the one who had ran into me. "I just did! Dork!" the kid laughed. Wonderful, a bully. Hopefully he'd be too focused on the other boy to pay any attention to me. For once, I lucked out. With a parting sneer, the boy swung a leg over his bicycle and rode away.

"Stupid jerk," the other kid muttered, brushing himself off. I had been afraid to focus on the other boy. I was already shaken from the abrupt violation of my personal space. Yet another great introduction to my new home.

_'Hey, you meet the new kid?'_

'What new kid?'

'You know, that one kid. Never comes out of his place. Must be afraid of the sunlight or something.'

'I saw him, he was spying on my brother and I. Probably a pervert.'

'He ran into me. Didn't even apologize, the little jerk.'

Wait, I hadn't apologized, had I? Oh dear, that's twice today that my nerves have overwhelmed proper etiquette. I couldn't apologize now, could I? Well, better late than never, as I always say. I don't always say that, actually. I don't even remember ever hearing it before. I wonder if we are born with a list of sayings and cliché's so we know what to expect in the world.

"Sorry," I so eloquently mumble to the ground. I'm apologizing to concrete now. What's next? Asking trees for the time of day? I must be going insane. Well, I counted over six thousand dots on the wall in my last home, so I can't be quite sane as it is.

"Hey, you alright?"

I looked up. "Pardon?"

"Com'on," he grabbed my hand and jerked me to my feet. Um. Ow. I think he pulled a muscle. "Sorry about that. Kevin's a jerk."

I said nothing. I had already shown off my brilliant social skills, I'm just going with the flow now.

"My name's Eddy," he volunteered. I looked up in surprise. Two Eds? What are the odds of that? It is a common name, I suppose. "What's your name?"

"Um. My name is Edd. With two 'd's…" I added. People often spelled it wrong, it's a pet peeve of mine.

"Edd with two 'de's, huh? You're an Ed too? That's awesome! That makes three of us! And you know what they say about threes!"

I searched despairingly, feeling the situation was distinctly out of my control. "…That three's a crowd?" Eddy stared at me for a moment before bursting out laughing. He slung an arm around my shoulders. Personal space being invaded again. I don't move. "You're funny. I like you. I was thinking more of the Three Musk-rats or whatever, but still…"

"Musketeers?"

"That's it! Here, wait a moment and I can introduce you to our last Ed. He just has to finish up with his sister before we can go."

I felt myself flush slightly. We? I felt much loathed hope surge within me. Funny? Musketeers? I have absolutely no idea how to react to any of this. This deviated so completely with my previous experience with my peers that I felt as though the ground had been pulled out from beneath my feet. I looked down and behold, the ground still remained. A little cracked, but solid. I wonder how many cracks there were. Eddy was talking animatedly somewhere to my left, his words somewhere beyond where I was.

One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-

At that moment, the doors to the grocery mart opened. I didn't pay much attention until Eddy raised his voice. "Hey! Ed! C'mere!" I glanced up and saw the two kids from before. Eddy removed his arm and waved.

The tall Ed promptly dropped his bags and ran over. His sister screamed, "ED! Come back here!" His sister. Oh dear, oh dear. Her gaze caught me and I dropped mine hurriedly. How rude of me to be eavesdropping and how embarrassing to be caught at it. Should I apologize? The decision was made for me when Eddy ignored the girl and pulled Ed over to face me.

"Ed meet Edd-with-two-d's. He's new. Edd-with-two-d's, this is Ed. He's stupid, so don't expect much from him." Well, that was…blunt.

"But Eddy! He can't be Ed cuz I'm Ed!" Ed wailed. I blinked as I saw the boy's face scrunch up like a three-year-old's.

"You've got a point, doofus. I know! We can call you Double D. It'll make it less confusing that way."

Confusing, to say the least. I had absolutely no clue over what had just happened. In the last five seconds, I think I gained…friends. I have no idea how it happened. Maybe that was how friendships were supposed to occur. Somehow, it didn't occur to me to protest when I was then dragged away by Eddy. I didn't wince despite the pain in my arm where Eddy had pulled too hard. Even when they later laughed at me when I finally spoke a full sentence, it couldn't quell the strange warmth in my chest. For the first time, it felt like I had belonged.

"Oi! Double D! Don't tell me you're still asleep in there!" Slightly muffed, the sound carried up through my open window, breaking me out of my thoughts. Ah yes, back to the present. Back to focus on the future day. Back to the future. Hm. I wonder how the hover-board works. Would Eddy be interested in making a design to sell to the other kids? Probably, but it would take a lot of time, and for all of Eddy's planning he has zero patience.

Since I met Eddy and Ed my days have been full. Whereas before one day would blur into the next in quiet monotony, each day only brightened by the sun-yellow color of the post-its, or the bright flashes from my chemicals, now they were filled with laughter and surprise. I mentioned that the day had become cliché'd, how everyday was a repeat of the next. Which was true. I could easy predict the outcome of each of our adventures in the cul-de-sac. But it was never boring.

I feared the day would soon come that I would wake up and on the breakfast table I would find a single sheet of plain white, typing paper signed by both my parents.

"Double D!"

"Coming, Eddy!"

End of chapter 1


	2. Chapter 2: Scams and Plans

**Chapter 2**

**Scams and Plans

* * *

**

**T**he sun rose. Traditionally accompanying this phenomenon in movies and books would be the caucus cry of a rooster. This is actually extremely uncommon in most of suburbia. However, our little corner of the world was the exception to many rules of the multiverse, including this one. And yet, even Rolf's rooster was cut off by an echoing cry of "COCK-A-DOODLE-_OINK_!" directly outside my bedroom window. I fell out of bed in a tangle of blankets at the sudden noise. Ed appeared at my side, somehow leveling my window open from the outside.

"Good morning, Double D!" He crowed cheerfully in my ear. I scowled blurrily up at him. How on earth did he get in? Better question, why was he here? That question I directed at Ed. "Why on earth are you here so early, Ed?" Rooster's crow at dawn. At _DAWN_. Such a time should not exist during the summer. At least, not at a conscious level. Now I was all-too conscious. I do believe it is healthy to get up early to start the day. "_Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, weathly, and wise_", I believe it was Benjamin Franklin who said that. Probably one of the most important inventor of his time. Discoverer of electricity from which we gain all of our comforts of today. Like electrical lights, for example. These genius devices can simulate day and night so we needn't be reliant on the sun to start our days. Please note that currently my overhead light is OFF.

I couldn't help but frown at the larger boy. It couldn't be healthy to be awaken so abruptly, especially when your wake up call was a combination of an incorrect rooster's call and the carpet meeting your face. I should have strong words with Ed about this. But I was too tired. And Ed still hadn't answered my question.

"Eddy said, 'Fetch Double D, Blockhead!'" Ed announced.

Fetch? What am I? A stick to a dog? Yet, before I could open my mouth, Ed hauled me to my feet. "Upsy Daisy, Double D! We must hurry! The Gravy Train leaves at noon!"

If the train leaves at noon then why are we up at DAWN? Better question. Why am _I_ up at dawn? Ed can do what he liked. Apparently, Ed currently decided that he liked waking me at an ungodly hour.

"Comecome, Double D!" Ed was fairly dancing on his toes at this point, eager to get where-ever Eddy had gone. I snorted and yanked the covers back on my bed and crawled under them. "Tell Eddy that he can wait until after the sun has risen above the horizon, Ed."

This was not what Ed wanted to hear. He started wailing and babbling nonsense about a spaceship coming to eat brains or some such thing. The key to listening to Ed is to filter out all unnecessary parts. Of course, sometime the mix is so thick that it is extremely difficult. That's when you need something to dilute it with water and… Oh, pardon me, I got onto my chemistry analogies.

At this point my covers were yanked violently off me. "Sleep not the day away, Double D! Sleeping makes you forget your numbers, yes it does."

I blink. Then watch in horror as Ed rummaged through my closet, literally tossing clothes into the air as he seemed fit to destroy my room. "ED!" I protested.

Ed spun around, my clothes… from _yesterday_ held clenched in his hand. He thrust them at me. "Hurry-hurry, Double D!"

I crossed my arms. No WAY was I going anywhere. Especially in _soiled _clothing! Now please, imagine my horror and disgust when Ed proceeded to SHOVE the clothes ON me! Curse Ed and his inhuman strength! Feeling rattled and a little queasy, Ed then dragged me out of my room. Blurs of yellow streaked past me. I think my brain shut down at this point. Slipping quietly into denial that this was happening.

Because it Was Not Happening.

I was finally dragged to a halt in front of Eddy wearing day old clothes, with no breakfast, a messy room, and a house covered in yellow.

And Eddy didn't even think that this would bother me. Or, if it did, that I should get over it. Though he was kind enough not to mention my bedraggled appearance. Probably because he knew it would be the final shake of the champagne bottle before the cork blew. Froth everywhere.

What Eddy didn't seem to understand is that I have a slight complex when it came to my schedules. I have to know that B will come after A, which will be followed by C, and so on. If something happens that deviates from this pattern, I obsess about it.

It happens with everybody. A problem that won't go away in your mind, something unsolvable, and the more you think about it the larger the problem becomes until its so large that you have a nervous breakdown, unable to handle it.

I'm awake at a god-awful hour of the morning.

In _soiled _clothing.

Without breakfast.

A _messy _room.

_Without _having done my _chores_!

This Was Wrong.

"_Salutations! My name is Eddward, and I am Obsessive Compulsive."_

_"HI, Edd!"_

"Ya got that, Double D?"

"Pardon?" I am amazed to find my voice calm when inside I am ready to start chucking lawn furniture at Eddy.

Eddy let out an explosive sigh. My hand twitched. "Haven't you been _listening_, Double D?"

Sorry Eddy, but I've been too busy contemplating homicide.

"My apologies, Eddy, I was thinking. Could you repeat that?" Eddy looked annoyed. An annoyed Eddy is never a good thing. Because then he blames everything on Ed or myself and it just becomes a huge mess. Sometimes it was better just to indulge him.

"I was explaining my most ingenious scam yet and you're not even paying attention!"

For some reason, I wasn't in the mood to indulge Eddy's ego.

"My apologies, Eddy. But I fear I may be suffering from exhaustion and starvation due to the fact I was dragged unceremoniously out of my bed and out here without any time of warning or explanation."

There was a half a second pause as Eddy translated this. Then another half second where he had to translate it a second time because the idea that this would inconvenience me was foreign to him.

I sound cruel. But I am not in the best of moods.

"No explanation!" Eddy finally finished decoding, and snapped. "What do you think I've been doing these last ten minutes? Planting daisies!"

"I like daisies, Eddy!" Ed put in.

"I don't see how your scam has to involve me when it is clearly too early to start anything! The other kids won't be out for hours!"

"Exactly! You can start working on it until Ed and I get back!"

Get. Back? They're planning on leaving it all to me! I can't believe it! No! Nonononono!

"No."

"What?" Eddy sounded as shocked as I feel. For once my brain and my mouth decided to work together without my say-so.

"No, Eddy." Just going with the flow now. "That you would wake me without warning is bad enough, but leaving me with all the work… I have better things to do with my time. Like sleeping." I turn on my heel and march away, head held high.

It is amazing to me to note that a few years ago the thought of speaking so boldly would have sent me cowering in a corner. I am not sure exactly what happened to cause this change. I guess in spending time with Eddy's insufferable ego, my own ego had to puff up in order not to be suffocated.

I'm surprised I still had an ego to puff up.

"Morn'n, Double D."

I jump. Looking around, I find that it was only Kevin, sitting on his driveway, working on his bike. Wait.

"What are you doing up this early?"

…Kevin is stealing my lines.

"Eddy," I shrug, as if that explains everything. In a way, it does, because Kevin snorts and returns to his bike. I hesitate. "And yourself?"

"What?" he asks.

"Why are you up at this unholy hour?"

Kevin laughed.

"Did I say something amusing?"

"Its Sunday. I'm waiting for my parents because we're going to Church."

…oh…

OH.

I can feel my face heating in embarrassment. I don't go to church. I used to occasionally, because Eddy's parents would invite me, but I always felt uncomfortable. As if I were intruding. Mostly because I feel uncomfortable surrounded by families when I'm by myself. People would ask inconvenient questions.

"You're lucky your parents don't make you go to church."

I smile vaguely as a familiar pain twisted in my chest. "Perhaps."

I remain standing there while Kevin continued tweaking his bike. The silence is strangely comfortable. The birds singing softly while an early morning breeze blew gently.

Words are an interesting concept. I admit feeling vague amusement that during the morning's excitement I kept likening the morning to be 'unholy' or 'ungodly'. That makes me wonder if subconsciously, I knew it was Sunday. It is funny how words are. One word could mean something entirely different in a different context. Take the word 'fine' for example. It can be used in the context of 'I am fine,' describing yourself. It also can be used when you _pay _a fine. Another word is 'dork.' 'Dork' is one of the most commonly used word in our cul-de-sac, constantly used in the context to ridicule. Kevin even calls me 'Double Dork', an amusing, if insulting, twist of my nick-name. However, in a completely different context, the word means a whale's…er, genitalia.

Shakespeare once said '_a rose by any other name would smell as sweet'_, however I do not think that is true. I mean, if it was given a crude name, like 'skunk-bush' it couldn't have smelled as pleasantly afterwards, would it?

It makes me wonder how my life would be different if I weren't named 'Eddward.'

Would Eddy and Ed still be my friends? They only really took interest in me when we found common ground in our names all being similar. Would they have looked at me twice if I were a Karl, or a Derek?

If I weren't an 'Edd' then I wouldn't have looked up in the grocery mart when Sara yelled Ed's name. I wouldn't have gotten flustered and left in a hurry, therefore, never running into Eddy. I would have gotten back to my house safely.

Would I still have been there? Locked up in my room, trapped by my own insecurity?

Words change things. When something is given a name, it is given an identity. There is a reason why you are not supposed to give a injured animal that you are simply healing, a name. Once you give something a name, you grow attached. Names are important.

So, if words become reality, what is the concept of belief? If we give something a name, and so it exists, because it cannot exist if it doesn't have a name. So, it makes me wonder, did God exist before man gave Him a name?

…I think I'm thinking too much.

And what in the world brought all that on! I really shouldn't be awake at this time, apparently I'm more insane than usual.

"Eddward, good morning!"

My head jerked up. I think this is the first time I actually met Kevin's parents. I've seen them, of course, around the cul-de-sac, but we were never formally introduced. How did she know my name? Kevin must have talked about me. Then why was she so friendly?

I could feel my face heating again. No matter how much confidence I have gained in the past few years, I still feel embarrassed when faced with new people. I think I expect them to be judging me, and most of my past experiences with that haven't been good.

I realize I've been staring at the ground, unconsciously numbering the lose pebbles, and pulled my gaze upward to meet the one coming from her. Kevin's mother was really very beautiful, with long red hair and hazel eyes that crinkled slightly at the corners. She wore a nice Sunday dress, patterned with fern leaves, and a straw hat. Kevin's mother smiled down at me, an action that threw me slightly.

"How are you doing this morning?" she asked. I could feel my flush deepen as I answered,  
"Very well, thank you for asking, ma'am."

"Are you coming to church this morning, Eddward?"

"N-no, ma'am."

"Ah, well, you know you are welcome any time, Eddward."

"T-thank you, ma'am." I heard a snort and saw Kevin with his arms crossed, glaring somewhere to his right.

"Dear! It's time to go! We're going to be late!" called Kevin's father, locking the front door behind him.

"Oh! Of course!" his mother said. "Kevin, could you please put your bike and tools away so we can get out of the driveway?"

"'Kay, Mom."

Glancing down at the mess of tools laying haphazardly across the driveway, I made a quick decision. "I-I'll help."

"Oh, how sweet of you!" She patted my shoulder encouragingly.

"It's n-no problem." Heat spread across my face again.

"C'mon, _Eddward_, let's get this over with," Kevin sneered as much as he dared in front of his mother.

My blush darkened again as I nodded. "O-of course."

"You didn't havta help. I can do this myself," Kevin said as we lugged the tool box into the garage.

"I know. I am only trying to be polite."

"Hmph."

Silence.

"You're mother is very nice."  
"Whatever."

When we had finished, I nodded politely to Kevin's mother, "It was nice meeting you, ma'am," and hurried away.

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It was later. Pain had happened. It had been a typical summer day in the cul-de-sac. I claimed I could predict each day, however I failed to mention that I could do nothing to change it. That includes my invention malfunctioning and getting my leg stuck in the mechanism. How could this have happened, you ask? In ten words or less, Automatic lunch-maker, jawbreakers, Kevin, Eddy, and a faulty wire spring. Believe me when I say that this is not a good combination. I have wrapped my leg in ice, hopefully the swelling will go down before tomorrow, when we'll have a repeat of today, hopefully sans the injury.

Quite frankly, today had not been a good day. What with having been abruptly dumped out of my nice, warm, bed, to having my leg mangled in my own machine, it was the type of day that I wish I had locked my window and remained in bed all day.

In my youth, I call it my youth because I can hardly remember a time when I was a child, I recall having nightmares. My dreams weren't of goblins, or strange demons living in some sticky, smelly heap under my bed. I dreamed of my parents. Actually, I dreamed about my parents, because they never appeared in my dreams. I remember running with cemented feet through the old house, lugging up eternities of stairs, searching for the tall, shadowy figures that remained just around the corner. Then, I would awaken, gasping for breath as if I had just run for miles. Rising from my bed, I paced the house, cataloging every Post-it as proof of their existence. Hating every single, yellow rectangle as much as I loved them, of their proof that I had not been forgotten.

I have nightmares of the day I wake to a world without yellow.

I rant occasionally to Eddy about my feelings towards the Post-its. Usually when They do something I find extremely inconsiderate. Like the time they didn't tell me they were re-doing the bathroom, for example. However, I do not think Eddy realizes how difficult it is for me to speak of them. How terrifying it was to know that at any moment I could be taken from my home by Child Services, and placed in a Home. I know what my parents do by leaving me home alone constantly goes against several child-protection laws. I find it strange now, to realize how much I have changed. Before, in my last home, as much as the thought terrified me, I couldn't help but wish, deep down, to open the door one day to find a pair of suits on my front step, telling me they were going to find a good family for me.

I would never accept it though. I could never accept it. It reeked of failure, of disappointment. To be found out, to be taken away, would be a betrayal of the trust my parents put in me at a very young age, to be able to hold up their reputation. I used to think they hated me, but now I know that can't be true. They are never around to even know me. No, they trusted me. They believed in me at the tender age of three, to walk out that door, and know that I would not burn it down in their absence. That I would, could cook and clean, and take care of myself. While I maintained the home, they were free to do what they loved most. Whatever that was. They could, and were gone for years and they knew that they could always come home to find it safe and warm, waiting for them. I hoped that one day the lure of a warm home would bring them back more often.

Of course, I haven't spoken of this to my friends. Its not that I don't trust them, its simply that they wouldn't understand. They have families. They might not treat them perfectly, but they knew that no matter how much trouble they got into, no matter how far they lean over the edge, that they could rely on someone catching them if they fell. Sometimes I wish I was an orphan. Because at least then I knew that no-one was there for me. It feels as though I am falling. I can feel the ground racing up to meet me, but I can't see it. I don't know if someone is there to catch me.

I think it's the not-knowing that drives me insane.

There is a speckle of dirt on the coffee-table.

From my position on the couch, I find myself locked in a staring contest with it. I could feel it, mocking me with its existence. Lying there, so cozy on the polished, wooden surface, its plotting. Sure, it is only a tiny, almost insignificant amount of dust, but if left alone, it will breed. Soon it would cover the entire coffee-table in filth before spreading to the floor, creeping along the carpet to stretch up to the walls…

I broke my gaze to grab the sanitized rag and scrub furiously at the vile spot.

Its existence obliterated, I lowered my weapon and sighed.

I still dream. Every time I look towards my house I look for a car in the driveway. I hesitate before opening the door, imagining on finding Mother or Father there to welcome me home. I'm such an idiot.

There's someone banging on my door. I slowly become aware of this as my thoughts trickle away. Confused on who it could be at this time of day, Eddy and Ed are usually at dinner about now, I limped over to the door in my pristine, white socks, flinching as I put weight on my injured leg. Upon opening the door, I froze.

"K-Kevin?"

Yes, it was Kevin. Complete with baseball cap and bike parked in my driveway. He glowered at me. "Finally! I've been knocking for five minutes!"

"My apologies, Kevin," I murmured uncertainly. What is he doing here? Is he seeking me out to taunt me now? Unable to keep his gaze, my eyes dropped. "Er, Kevin? Why are you holding a plate of cookies?"

"Uh, yeah." Now, Kevin sounded embarrassed. I glanced up. My poor bush next to my front step is being subjected to one of Kevin's most annoyed look. "My mom wants you to have these. For helping out earlier." I stare down at the plate thrust into my hands. They are oatmeal raisin. My favorite. What a kind gesture. Meeting Kevin's gaze again I smile. "Thank you, Kevin."

"It was my mom's idea," Kevin snapped. I grinned. He's funny when he gets defensive.

"I know. Thank her too. I was thanking you for delivering them. It was very nice of you."

"Yeah, whatever." Now I'm certain. There is a faint blush on his cheeks. Covering my mouth, I try to hide my smile. Kevin noticed and scowled. "Tell anyone and I'll kill you," he growled.

"I wouldn't dream of it, Kevin."

He eyed me suspiciously before snorting, "Fine."

Shifting the plate slightly in my grip as we drifted into an uncomfortable silence.

"Well, I should-"  
"Would you like to-"

"Sorry."

"Oh, my apologies."

"Uh…" Kevin stuck his hands in his pocket. "What were you gonna say?"

"Oh, um. Would you like to come in?"

Kevin shot me a look. "Why?"

I glanced down. "Well, we both cleaned up your driveway. We can share these."

There's no way he'd agree. I can't believe I even asked that. This is ridiculous. I might as well have just begged him to make fun of me. I don't know what I'm thinking.

"Yeah, okay."

"What?"

A flicker of a smirk passed over Kevin's face at my shocked expression. He shrugged. "I don't have nothing better to do."

"Oh, um. Yes. Er, come on in," I held the door open for him. Glancing at my living room, I flinched. "I'm sorry about the mess. I wasn't expecting company."

Kevin glanced around as he removed his shoes politely and set them down on the matt next to my own. "Uh, right."

He settled himself on the couch as I bustled into the kitchen. Setting the plate on the table, I took out smaller plates for individual servings and collapsed into a chair with my head in my hands. Oh dear. Now what? Kevin, the cul-de-sac's most popular boy and bully, was sitting in my living room. What on earth should we talk about? We have nothing in common! I can't believe this. If I knew he'd accept, I would never have invited him. No, I lie. I would have, because it is polite to invite someone in when they come over for a kind act. My parents would be ashamed of me if I was anything less than polite, even to my worse enemy.

Is Kevin my worst enemy? I can't help but wonder. Sure, he's a bully, but he has never gone out of his way to harm me. There has always been some kind of catalyst before hand. Usually in the form of one of my inventions. There has even been times when we have been civil to one another. It makes me wonder if he really does hate me.

"Oi! Double Dork!" Something rapped me on the head, startling me.

"K-Kevin?"

How easily Kevin seems to be able to sneak up on me while I am in the midst of my thoughts. I really should start paying more attention.

"Geez, Double D, space out much?" Kevin asked, with a slight smirk.

I flinched, "My apologizes, Kevin. I suppose I'm a little distracted today."

"Yeah, whatever. Do you got anything to drink?"

"Oh!" Stupid, stupid! "Of course, my most sincere apologizes, Kevin! What would you like? I have water, grape juice, orange juice, and milk."

"What? No soda?"

"N-no. I don't drink soda, its terribly bad for you. My apologizes."

"You don't have to apologize every five seconds, Double D. Milk's good. Best with cookies, anyway."

I went to stand up, gasping as my leg let out a spasm of pain.

"You okay?" I looked up at the uncharacteristic offer of concern. Kevin watched me carefully.

"I'm fine…" I said, making to stand again. Kevin shoved me back down. I stared up at him, confused.

"Where are the glasses?" he asked before looking around. Spotting the cabinet marked 'glasses', he snorted. "Nevermind."

I remained seated, watching anxiously as he pulled two glasses and filled them with milk from the fridge. He put one of the table in front of me and sat down across from me with the other. I felt like I was a part of some play, except I had never gotten the script. I examined the grain of wood in front of me, hearing the clink of the glass as Kevin took a drink and set it on the table.

"So…"

I jumped, then pretended that I hadn't. I glanced up to see Kevin looking at me oddly. He looked away as soon as our eyes met. Strange. "What happened to your leg?"

"Oh, um. I am sure you recall Eddy's ingenuitious scheme to earn some finances using a-"

"Lunch-maker, yeah. I creamed you guys because the stupid thing shot sandwiches like bullets," he hesitated. "Did I-?"

"Oh, no. I fear my abrasion came from when the machine itself decided to shoot sandwiches sporadically. I was trying to fix it, and a wire-spring snapped."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

Silence descended once again with Kevin fidgeting with his glass. "Is it bad?"

I glanced down at my leg. "Oh, no. It should be fine in a couple of days. No need to worry, Kevin."

I could see Kevin bristle. "I'm not worried! Why would I care about you!"

That hurt. I smiled, trying to ignore the familiar pain. Of course he wouldn't care, it was just that he sounded like… I suppose he was simply making conversation. It was more than I managed to do. I glanced down, vaguely noticing that Kevin had finished half the glass of milk already. That gave me an idea. Well, why not? It is a line of conversation that I can confidently offer.

"Out of curiosity, Kevin. How much liquid would you say is in that glass?" I said, confident in my new role. Explaining facts of life is what I've always been most comfortable with. I may not have a lot of confidence, but these words from respected geniuses in their fields is what I can always fall back on.

Kevin glanced down and looked up and smirked. "Enough to enjoy a few cookies with, but not enough to really enjoy if you're thirsty. I'm not stupid, Double D. I'm not going to be tricked into that stupid half-full/half-empty nonsense."

Nonsense! "Its not nonsense, I-"

"Of course it is," he interrupted. "It states that if you say that glass is half-full then you are an optimist, and half-empty you are pessimistic. However, if you are drinking from the glass you think in terms of it leaving, therefore in your mind it is gradually getting empty, but if you are filling it up, then its getting fuller. Its never _always _one or the other."

I stared in complete consternation at Kevin. He shifted slightly under my gaze. "My uncle is a psychiatrist. He pulled that on me when I was six."

I blinked, "Oh."

"I should go."

"Oh! But, you never had any cookies!" I protested, distressed that my hosting abilities were so terrible.

"Maybe some other time. It's late. My dad'll kill me if I'm past nine."

"Oh." I hadn't considered that. He has family waiting for him at home. I'm amazing how often I forget that about other people. "Alright. I'll walk you to the door."

Kevin stood up, shaking his head. "That's okay. You're hurt."

"No, Kevin. I'm fine," I smiled. Please let me do this, Kevin. I've been a horrible host, I at least need to see you out. Kevin watched me carefully, before sighing. "Fine, fine. Do what you want."

I smiled, this time genuinely, and Kevin looked away. On our way out to the living room, Kevin walked to match my shuffling pace, both of us silent. Glancing at him out of the corner of my eye, I can't help but wonder what he thinks of me. He thinks I'm a dork, that much is obvious. However, there are times that I wonder if that is it. I know he thinks of Eddy as a dork and a greedy, selfish pinhead. He told me so himself, once. He also thinks of Ed as a dork, but also as a strong, if stupid oaf.

What about me?

I stopped when we reached the door. Kevin pulled on his shoes and nodded to me. "G'night, Double D."

"Goodnight, Kevin. Thank you and your mother for the cookies. I'm sure they will be wonderful."

He shrugged and left, closing the door behind him. What does he think about me? Probably that I'm a dork, plus an annoying, know-it-all, who can't do any athletics to save his life. What was I thinking when I thought we could be friends? I'm only getting my hopes up for no reason. I sighed.

Suddenly, I froze on my way back to the kitchen. Kevin had said 'maybe some other time.' He was willing to come back? Or was he just being polite? Oh dear!

End of Chapter 2

Any notes regarding this story, progress on each additional chapter, up-to-date information on future updates can be found on my profile. Sorry about the wait! Happy New Year!


	3. Chapter 3: Plans and Tutors

**Chapter 3**

**Plans and Tutors

* * *

**

**I** was foolish to think that one meeting would change things. Life continued much the same as it has always had done. The world moved, leaving me running to keep up, always trailing along the edges trying to understand this world of clichés and cliques. Some days I find myself thrust into this world where I flounder in the sudden onslaught of gravity.

Since that night, nothing has changed between Kevin and myself. He ignores me unless I am with Eddy, and even then, he focuses all of his frustration/attention on Eddy, leaving me watching from the sidelines. If it were not for the cookies placed in a decorative circle on the plate in my kitchen, I would think that I had imagined that night. Or maybe I have, and I baked the cookies myself in my sleep. No, that can't be true, I checked the inventory list of my kitchen and I am not missing any ingredients except for 36 ounces of milk, enough for two glasses. So I know that it happened and Kevin was ignoring it, ignoring me.

I can not believe that I am surprised by this. Kevin isn't the most caring individual, which is kind of part of the job description of the local bully. I don't believe I have ever heard him laugh without a sneer in his voice, I don't think I've ever seen him smile without a smirk.

Is he really a bully? It is not as though he wakes up in the morning and thinks, '_Hey! It's Tuesday! Time to beat up those dorks and steal their lunch money!_' In fact, he's never taken anything from us. He's even given away free jawbreakers before. What makes a bully in comparison to just plain dislike?

Does this really matter? What will I gain by analyzing Kevin like this, it's not as if I really know anything substantial about him. Besides his uncle being a psychiatrist, and his father somehow gets a hold of a lot of jawbreakers, I think he works at the factory or something. You would think he'd rot his teeth with the amount of candy he is likely getting.

I like candy, I _love _candy, I'm a kid, it's part of the requirements. However, I cannot have any type of candy without immediately brushing my teeth afterwards. The thought of all that sugar eroding away at my teeth makes me want to brush even when I have just done so.

Speaking of which, I need to find a reason to get away from Eddy and Ed to do this as soon as I finish my jawbreaker. Yes, we actually managed to keep hold of our earnings this day. Don't ask me how, I'd really rather not remember. My moral compass is still spinning.

That tends to happen a lot these days. Eddy is getting more and more imaginative with his scams. Usually I want to encourage such creativity, however there are times when I just want to sit him down and explain to him the 'do's and 'don't's of society. I never do. It would be like trying to explain quantum physics to Ed. Really, it is better to save my breath. Usually for running. Not running to anything per say, just away. Mostly away from whatever just exploded, be it a invention of mine or Kevin's temper.

"Geez, Double D, what is with you today?"

I jerked my head up in surprise at the sudden proximity of Eddy's face. "Pardon?"

"You okay, man? You're spacing out a lot lately."

"_Geez, Double D, space out much?" _

I jumped again, before plastering on a vague smile. "I'm perfectly well, thank you for asking, Eddy."

Eddy sort of glared at me and I tried not to fidget. I could practically hear him thinking, "_I'm not going to ask, because that would show I might actually really care, and that's bad for my image."_ Of course that's just me. For all I know he's thinking about his new Magazines he stole from his brother. Yes, Magazines, with the capital letter. Those Magazines that would cause his mother fits if she ever found them, that Eddy hordes and holds in a higher esteem than money. Not even I have seen what is inside these famed pages.

"Double D's thinking deep thoughts, Eddy," Ed said. I tried not to choke on my tongue. If only he knew. Ed, I've noticed, doesn't talk so much as sing, each word spoken in a new pitch and the melody is one that only he can hear. It makes it as difficult as it is easy to listen to.

"Come on, guys. I want to get this done before dinner. I got stuff to do."

"What could possibly be more important than your scams?" I asked airily. Eddy snorted. "I've got homework. Dad'll kill me if I don't pass all my classes this year."

"…But classes let out last week, Eddy. How can you have homework?"

"Well, actually, the teachers don't enter their grades until the day after tomorrow. So, I just need to get them in tomorrow and I'm good to go!"

"That's amazingly stupid, Eddy." I sigh, "How much do you have? Maybe I can help."

"I wish. My dad's making me do it all out in the kitchen where he can watch. He's really pissed at me."

"I wonder why! How much do you have?"  
"Oh, I dunno…" Eddy looked uncomfortable, which made me nervous. "Like, the full year, give or take?"

"EDDY! A year! How could you let it pile up like that!"

Eddy shrugged. "Easy. I just didn't do it. Now, this is what I need you to do…" Eddy looked around and leaned forward and whispered instructions in my ear. He always does that, I can't think why. It's not as if there is ever anyone listening in.

_"And this is Eddy. He suffers from acute paranoia. Not to mention extreme procrastination."_

_"Hi, Eddy!"_

_"You ain't getting anything from me, you psychos!"_

I can't imagine what goes on in Eddy's head. I mean, really, postponing a full year's worth of homework and thinking he could do it in one evening? Well, if there's anything about Eddy that I know, its that once he's put his mind to something, be afraid. Be very afraid.

¸.·´¯·»¸.·´¯·»¸.·´¯·»«·´¯·.¸«·´¯·.¸ **«·´¯·.¸**  
**¸.·´¯·»¸.·´¯·»«·´¯·.¸** **«·´¯·.¸**

The day passed as all days do, the sun worked its way through the sky, uncaring of the beings it continually beat down upon. Its almost human, in a way. At last, Eddy called an end to the day's activity, grumbling to himself about the amount of homework he had. I sniffed and told him it was his own fault, because, really, it was. He brought this upon himself, I wasn't going to bail him out. Not that I didn't offer. He told me to get lost when I did. I think he is still sore about his father getting involved.

Eddy has a good father, from what I can tell. Although my own experience in the matter is somewhat lacking. If there were one characteristic that was poor about his dad, it would be that Eddy was often ignored. Not forgotten, per say, it was more as if their familial unit worked in a more traditional, idealistic way. Eddy's mother stayed home to take care of the housework, and his father worked and supported the family. I'm not sure what he does for a living, maybe I should start paying more attention to that sort of thing, however he does tend to bring his work home with him more often than not. What this means is that while Eddy craves his father's attention, when he is given it, it is mostly negative. This contradictory responses on Eddy's part leads him to act out more, trying to garner more of his father's notice. For example, putting off the year's homework so he could spend an evening with his father.

Of course, I could be way off, I am no expert in these situations. I've barely made it to the Orientation Hall in these matters, in fact. It was just casual conjecture on my part. Still, it wasn't as though Eddy truly wanted my help. Like I said before, once he sets his mind to something… Eddy is very clever, he can do his work himself, I'm not needed.

I frowned. It wasn't as if anyone needed me, really. I'm just there as the irrepealable third Stooge. Sometimes I wonder if I moved tomorrow if I'd even be missed. Sure, I'd be thought of, when Eddy would turn to the empty space beside him and demand the schematics for his latest scheme, but they could get on without me. Eddy is smart, he could create some way to make his ideas work.

Sometimes I think that I need them more than they need me. That scares me a little.

Vaguely annoyed, I kicked at a pebble that stood out against the concrete, watching it skitter away.

"I can't believe this!" I jumped slightly at the raised voice. "Grounded all summer just because of a couple low grades!"

The sneering anger was familiar. Kevin. Looking around, I caught a glimpse of a green sleeve through an opening in the wooden fence next to me. Now, I'm not really one to eavesdrop, the action being incredibly rude and the consequences of being caught being excruciatingly painful. However, I was cursed with a terrible curiosity. It was this curiosity that killed the metaphorical cat, and it was this same curiosity that moved my feet closer to the fence. I peered cautiously around the corner. Kevin sat perched on his bike kicking at various rocks, watching them ricochet off the nearby wall. With him stood Rolf, nodding with a puzzled expression.

"What mean this grounded?" he asked in his thick accent. Of course, the concept of grounding would be lost on our Ethnic neighbor. It was something I have noticed in the quest of our American Dream. More often than not, the people who are responsible for achieving the goals of the American dream within the last few decades, have been immigrants. These people who come from countries without the opportunities they have here, and they try much harder than the people born and raised. Rolf is one of these people, he works hard at home and in school. Rolf nodded in sympathy to Kevin's problem, but he had trouble understanding why Kevin didn't work harder so as to not have gotten into this situation to begin with.

"It means, Rolf, that I'm going to have to go to _summer _school."

I couldn't help it, I gasped. Slapping both hands over my mouth, I winced, holding my breath. They didn't hear me. Thank goodness. But summer school! That is a cruel punishment. There are few children in existence who do not shudder at the utterance of this name and the images that it conjures. A closed-up room with no A.C. in the boiling heat, while just outside the window you can see all your friends playing in a water fountain, while you remain choking on the smell of chalk.

Truly a nightmare. Learning is all well and good, but there's a difference between a casual read of an encyclopedia and being locked up in an airless classroom.

Kevin cursed and kicked another rock. This one shot off the opposite wall and clipped the board near my head. I ducked, but too late. "Hey!"

Oh… shoot! What do I do now? Think, Double D, think! My thoughts raced. Running was out of the question, I was no athlete, plus Kevin had his bike. Hiding was no use, and there is no way I could fight my way out.

_If you can't go over it, around it, or under it…Just go straight through. _

I stepped out. "H-hey, Kevin," I raised my right hand in greeting.

Kevin got into my face and snarled, "How long were you standing there!"

I tried my best not to flinch, and failed. "N-not long." My gaze dropped as Kevin loomed over me, his shadow merging with mine against the sidewalk panels.

One panel, two, three, four, five…

"You were listening in! What makes you think its alright for you to eavesdrop, Double _Dork_! Did you think you are too good for us, that you could listen in? It was none of your business! How dare you! Did you think it was funny!"

Sixteen, seventeen, eighteen…

"Did you?" Kevin grabbed my shoulders hard with both hands. I could feel his nails digging through my shirt. "Look at me!"

I tried lifting my eyes to his face and only made it to his shoulder when he shook me. Scared, no, terrified, I clenched my eyes shut, preparing myself for the first blow.

"Do you think its funny! You going to tell your pathetic little friends that Kevin is so stupid that he has to go to summer school!" He shook me again.

"Y-y-you're not stupid," the words fell out of my mouth, trembling. The violent shaking ceased.

"What?" Kevin growled, applying more pressure into his bruising grip. I winced. I could feel my skin already discoloring.

Thirty-nine, forty….

"I don't t-think you're stupid, Kevin," I mumbled. "You were… You were in a lot of… of extra curricular activities this year. Ma-maybe you just got… got lost."

I stumbled as Kevin pushed me away harshly.

"I ain't dumb." I glanced up. Kevin was scowling, not looking at me. I wasn't sure who he was talking to. A feeling slowly stole over me. Kevin was…embarrassed. Big, bad Kevin was embarrassed that I, the lowly Double Dork, had heard him admit he had trouble in school.

"Maybe your parents won't make you go to summer school…" I began slowly. Kevin's head whipped around to stare at me. "What the hell are you talking about!" he snapped.

I flinched slightly at the tone. I never took it well when people yelled at me. "Well, uh, I was just thinking…"

"Yeah yeah, we all know how _good _you are at that, dork!" Kevin's tone was vicious. It was infuriating to be overheard by the cul-de-sac's local 'genius', I'm sure. His ego must be smarting anyway from the grades. I need to be patient. I took a breath and tried again. "Well, I was thinking that if, maybe, you put a little effort into studying during the summer, your parents will see you are trying and let you off."

Kevin snorted. "I already have to study. They already enrolled me in _summer school_," he spat the words as if they were poisonous.

"Oh…"

Kevin sneered and turned away, but I rallied. "Maybe I can help, Kevin!" I have no idea what made me speak these words. I wasn't exactly Kevin's favorite person, but I wouldn't be Double D if I didn't at least offer to help. "I could tutor you."

"Tu-" Kevin looked around, shocked. Then he scowled. "This is another scam, right? No way."

"No, no!" I waved my hands in front of me, negatingly. "I won't even charge you."

Kevin eyed me suspiciously. "…Why?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly. I don't know why I was offering. Kevin had been anything but nice to me since we were kids. But, there was the other night. I could remember the awkward stance of the other boy on my front step. It was rare to see Kevin so unsure. It was relieving, in a way, to suddenly remember that Kevin was human, and not some huge impending shadow of doom.

After all we went through, the kids in the cul-de-sac were bonded. We were a strange mix of kids and spent our summers in almost constant conflict. It was almost a type of feud. We were constantly pitted against each other, yet somehow I knew that if any kind of outside force were to attack one of us, we were band together against the foe.

The kids in the cul-de-sac helped each other when needed. That was how I thought. Whether the other kids thought it too, it doesn't really matter. Now, Kevin needed my help. So, I offered it, and that was all that mattered. "If, if you got a tutor, maybe you could convince your parents that you are trying hard to improve and they won't make you go to summer school."

Kevin stared at me for a long moment. I could feel the sun pressing waves of heat against the back of my neck as it inched closer to the horizon. It was nearing dinner, soon I would have to leave to start preparing tonight's meal. I would be thinking of this moment all evening, beating myself over my head at the complete stupidity of my actions.

"Sounds good."

"Excuse me?"

"I said, 'sounds good,'" Kevin rolled his eyes. "You can be my tutor."

I stared for a long moment, "Really?" Before smiling slightly, "Alright."

Kevin smirked at me, for a second his eyes joined it so it almost looked like a smile. I smiled tremulously back. He took a step towards me, "Come on."  
I blinked. "Pardon?"

"Come on," he jerked his head. "You're coming to my place."

"I am?"

"You're much better with words than I am, I want you to talk to my parents about this tutoring thing."

I raised a trembling finger directed at me. "Y-you want me to t-talk to your p-parents!"

"Did I stutter?" For a second I thought Kevin looked uncomfortable, but it passed before my eyes quickly. Kevin grabbed hold on my hand, pulling me as I stumbled behind.

"See you later, Rolf!" Startled, my head spun around to stare at the forgotten Rolf. He grinned broadly and waved. "See you later, you two!"

Oh my Goodness. He's going to… He wants me to… I'm incoherent, I'm so petrified. And if he doesn't slow down he's going to pull my arm right off! I'll be the one-armed Double D. Smart as anything but you might want to duck if he tries to juggle.

Why me? I'm not a bad person. I try to do everything a good, respectable son is supposed to. I am polite, when I remember, and clean to a fault, I never swear or tear my clothes, on purpose, and I do what I'm told. So, I'm not perfect, but I try to be, is that so wrong? Isn't effort what counts? What did I do in my last life to deserve this? Did I kill someone or something? If so, don't you think I've been punished enough?

A particularly bad yank caused a familiar pain up my arm. Why is it that at the beginning of every friendship of mine, my arm ends up being a casualty?

"Here." I nearly plowed into Kevin as he stopped abruptly, dropping my arm. Catching myself in time, I rubbed at my wrist. More bruising, how lovely.

Or so I'm calling this a 'friendship'. Let's try and remain optimistic here. A few days ago, Kevin came over to deliver a plate of cookies from his mother, and even stayed, helping out when I was hurt. We had a polite, stilted conversation, and he made no comments about the horrible condition of my house. Speaking of which, I'm going to need to pick up some more bleach at the store tomorrow. The morning after Kevin's visit, I scoured the house from top to bottom and used up three containers of bleach. My remaining two had to last me until the weekend, when my father gets paid and transfers the money into the house account, which I'm allowed to use.

Anyway, after Kevin left, he implied doing it again, which was either a friendly offer or a polite brush-off. I am not good at telling the difference. Though with the evidence of the next few days I assumed it was the latter. However, now… I don't know. Maybe he just wants me for my brain.

….Okay, that sounded really awkward. I'm going to just blow on past that. Geez, did Kevin scared me back there. I should be used to fear from my peers. From Kevin's volatile temper to the Kanker sisters' infatuation with us Eds, you would think that I would be accustomed to moments of impending bodily harm. Yet I find that the more violence you experience the more you fear it. The minor injuries don't just stop hurting when you are used to larger ones, it just becomes easier to manage around them. But Kevin's sheer proximity to me, the anticipation of his attack scared me more than I have been in a long time.

"Double D!"

I jerked, glancing sheepishly up at Kevin. I had been spacing out again. I should work on that. "Sorry, Kevin."  
"That's fine. Do you know what you're gonna say to my parents?"

What? Oh right! Darn it! What am I going to say to them? "_Hello ma'am. Say, I was wondering, just for kicks, could you _not _send your son to summer school and let me tutor him? I'm sure I'm much more qualified than his teachers! Pay? No way! Just let the payment be Kevin not beating me up!"_

Right. That would work fine, and maybe afterwards they'll be so grateful they'd adopt me. Why don't I dream up something useful for a change?

"I-I'm sure I can think of something," I tried. Kevin shrugged and pulled open the door.

"Shoes on the mat," he indicated after waving me in. I looked down in surprise. Hey, I'm not the only one to want people to take their shoes off indoors! Slipping off my shoes, I fidgeted with them on the mat for a second before standing up and nodding to Kevin. He tilted his head back. "Mom!"

"In here, Kevin!" called the familiar, melodic sound of his mother voice. "Living room," Kevin told me, striding off in that direction. Trailing along behind, I took in my surroundings. It really was a nice house. Very clean. There are lots of pictures on the walls, mostly of Kevin, but there were a fair amount of Kevin's mother and father in their younger days. I smiled at a wedding photo as we passed. Kevin's father had cake smeared on his nose and his mother held the offending slice, laughing. My heart ached for a moment before I brushed it off.

"Hey, Mom?"

I stopped behind Kevin. We stood just outside the living room with him blocking me from view. I'm a little grateful.

"How was your day, dear?" Kevin's mom asked. Kevin fiddled with the brim of his ball-cap. "Good. Hey, uh, Mom?"

"Yes, dear?"

You know, I don't think I've ever seen Kevin look this uncomfortable.

"Look, um. I know I didn't do so well this last school year, but I really don't think summer school will help."

"Oh, yeah?" She sounded suspicious. Shoot, I'm suspicious. I wonder where he's planning to take this.

"Yeah. I don't think I will really focus, you know, inside a classroom as well as I could." I really wish I could see his face at this angle.

"And what would you suggest?" Definitely not convinced there. Apparently his mom is good as seeing through Kevin.

"A tutor." Kevin grabbed my arm and hauled me into the room. I blinked, standing stalk-still. Is there suddenly a spot-light on me? Oh no, its just the vehicle's headlights headed straight for me.

"H-h-hello, ma'am." I gave a sort of partial wave, waiting for the squeal of tires. When the noise didn't come, I look up under my eyelashes. Kevin's mother sat on a floral patterned couch with her mouth slightly ajar.

"E-Eddward," she set down her book, carefully keeping her place with a finger. "Good evening, Eddward, I didn't see you there. Kevin? What is this about? A tutor?"

Kevin nudged me slightly in the back. This was my cue, I suppose. I took a breath.

"Ma'am, I had heard Kevin vouch concern over his poor absorption of this last year's curriculum." I'm nervous, can you tell? "Moreover, he was concerned that the classroom will be more of a hindrance than a help. As you can no doubt imagine, the mere thought of being imprisoned indoors on a summer day is one not conductive to cognitive growth. The distraction is too much. Therefore, I offered my own services. I maintain a high grade-point average, have many books and projects that could be of help, and the lessons could be shaped to his specific needs. At the end of the summer he could take the placement exam to pass the classes he failed and continue to the next grade of school without a problem."

As I finished I became aware of Kevin's mother staring at me in a sort of daze. I worried my lower lip between my teeth. I hope I didn't come on too strong.

"You have certainly thought this through," she began slowly. "However, the advantage to Kevin going to summer school is that he has a certified teacher right there. I'm sure you are very smart, but you are still only in seventh grade." Eighth, we just finished seventh, I corrected mentally. "What would happen if you try and tutor him and end up playing games? Do you think you could keep on track as well as if he were in a classroom?"

I opened and closed my mouth several times before Kevin jabbed me in the back again. "I-I'm very responsible. I'm sure if you ask any of our teachers they can tell you that I am most qualified to teach what we learned this past year. If you want, I can create lesson plans that we can have the teacher look over, and perhaps test his knowledge on a bi-weekly basis. That way you can be sure that I am truly helping and you can view his progress."

"Hmm," she considered me, tapping a finger against the spine of her book. "You seem very determined to help my son."

I could hear the unasked question. Why? Why would I help this boy who has made my life nothing but misery? The times he was cruel to me far outweighed the moments of kindness. Yet, in our history together there has been moments of kindness. I suppose that's why. In those moments I could see me become something more rather than Double Dork. It was nice to be seen as another person, instead of the smart one of the trio. Although, now that I think about it, being his tutor wouldn't exactly encourage that behavior.

Instead I said, "Yes, ma'am," and fell silent. She eyed me for a long moment. "My husband and I will have to talk it over. My son will let you know sometime tomorrow."

I nodded, suddenly shy. "Th-thank you. And thank you again for those cookies the other day. They were delicious."

She smiled, "You're welcome. The recipe is from my grandmother. They're my favorite kind of cookie."  
"Mine as well," I smiled faintly.

"Would you like to stay for dinner? If your family doesn't mind, of course," she asked suddenly. I cast a quick look at Kevin out of the corner of my eye in time to see the panicked look flash across his face. Right.

"No, thank you, ma'am. It's my night to cook and I must be going."

"Oh! You cook?" She seemed surprised.

"Yes. My parents are very busy and I try to help out as much as I can."

"Oh really?" She cast a very significant look to Kevin, who coughed.

"Come on, Double D. I'll show you out," he grabbed my arm, guiding me out of the room.

"Be sure to stop by again, Eddward! We'll let you know about our decision as soon as we can," she called out to me as Kevin bustled me toward the door.

"Goodbye!" I managed to call back. Well, that went well.

"What was all that about?" Kevin hissed.

"What?"

"All that 'tests' and 'bi-weekly' crap! I don't want to be stuck with more work than if I went to summer school!"

"Oh! I-I just thought…" What? What did I think? Shoot, there I go again, putting my foot in my mouth. Why, oh why, do people think I'm smart? If I were, how in the world do I get myself into these situations! "They were suggestions. You know, a starting point. I'm sure it won't be a problem. We can work at your pace. Besides, this will be mostly review material for you, just sort of rearranging the material so its easier to understand. You're smart, but the way they teach at school doesn't always work for everyone." This was blatant manipulation on my part, but if it'll release the grip on my arm then I don't have any problem with it.

I flinched as Kevin's hand tightened slightly before releasing me. Great, another set of bruises to add to the collection. At this rate I'll be more patterned than a pair of pants in the 60s.

"Fine," Kevin growled, massaging his hand. Quickly, I put on my shoes and open the door. "Double D?"

I turn. "Yes?"

"Thanks."

I smiled at Kevin, who seemed to find the carpet enthralling.

"It's not a problem, Kevin."

I palm the door shut after me. Fresh air filled my lungs as the sunset washed over the cul-de-sac turning the quiet suburb alight with a fiery glow.

Well, at least this was new. I can certainly see that this summer will be much more interesting than I had previously dreaded. I only wonder if I can survive it.

end of chapter 3

Any notes regarding this story, progress on each additional chapter, up-to-date information on future updates can be found on my profile.


	4. Chapter 4: Tutors and Understandings

**Chapter Four**

**Tutors and Understandings**

**I**t's funny how in one short minute of your life your world can turn upside down. It is quite a similar sensation to falling, only your feet are firmly on the ground. You're wondering if this rushing sensation is the blood leaving your head and you find yourself trying to angle yourself so as to not to knock your head on anything should you faint. It was this same sensation I had when I found out we were moving. It was the same sensation I experienced now with the phone pressed against my ear.

_"They said okay."_

Three short words, that's all it took for the floor to be ripped out from under my feet leaving me stumbling for my footing.

In all honesty, I never expected them to say yes. I mean, really, when compared to a real classroom what is it that I could teach him? Plus, really, Me? Try to teach someone like Kevin? We'll be at each other's throats within twenty minutes. Or rather, he'd be at my throat. More than likely, he'll have me do all his work for him, make up some figures, and try to pass them off to his parents.

I need to think of a plan. A real, sure-fire way to make sure this works. One that is acceptable to Kevin's parents, Kevin, and myself. To do that, I believe I shall need a little help.

I volunteered to help Eddy take in his overdue homework. It was quite exhausting due to the sheer volume of papers we had to carry. Eddy was quiet on the way, practically asleep on his feet. He must have stayed up all night working. His reward from me for his diligence was forgoing my speech about karma and how it was his fault entirely. His reward from his father, he told me, was a whole evening devoted to him and since he actually managed to finish all the back-work, an escape from summer imprisonment.

"Did you have any trouble?" I asked curiously.

"Naw. I mean, chemistry was a pain, but my dad helped."

"That's good," I smiled over my armful of papers.

"So what are you going to do after this?"

"Hm?"

"Lumpy's under house arrest for the day, remember? And my old man's taking me out to dinner tonight."  
"Is he? That's great, Eddy!"

"Yeah. My choice too. I guess his project went over real well with his boss and he got some paid time off. This weekend, me and my parents are going… I dunno, somewhere, I think skiing is involved, to celebrate. For the whole weekend!"

"Wow!"

I am not jealous. I'm happy for Eddy. He deserves time with his father, with his family. They work hard, it'll be good for them to spend some vacation time together.

I'm not jealous at all.

Man, I can't even lie to myself convincingly.

"Where are you going?"

"I forgot," Eddy shrugged, jostling his papers. After a few minutes of comedic stumbling around, in which as soon as he retrieved an escaped paper another would slip away, Eddy straightened and glanced at me. "What are you going to do?"

"Oh," I said airily, my gaze scanning the scenery in a vague attempt to look nonchalant, "I'm sure I'll find something to do. Catch up on some of my reading, or chores that I missed last Sunday."

"Geez, Double D, will you let that go already?"

"Well, it was awfully rude of you, Eddy."

"Whatever, okay? I won't do it again. There. You happy?"

I sigh. "Yes, Eddy." Although an apology would be nice. I know better than to expect one though. To Eddy, a sincere apology is as foreign as a book of calculus in Ed's room. I know this and yet I'm still slightly disappointed.

I wonder why I do this to myself. I keep building up my hopes and expectations, no matter how many times life beats them down.

I must be the strangest mix of optimistic pessimism the world has ever known. Still, one must continue on as best one can.

"Here we go," Eddy huffed as the last pile landed on the English teacher's desk with a _whump_. The teacher seemed a little stunned by the mass of back-work in front of her.

"This…is all of it?"

"All term's. Yeah. You said we can still turn stuff in until today," Eddy smirked, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

"I did," she agreed, clearly rethinking that policy.

"Right. Come on, Double D." Eddy slammed the door open beside me. I frowned at his lack of care of his surroundings, or that it missed me by inches. "You go on ahead, Eddy. I want to talk with our teacher for a bit."

Eddy scowled suspiciously back at me. "You're not looking for more extra credit, are you? I think the grade-curve will start to cry."

"No," I laughed. "I just have a few questions about a paper I wrote."

Eddy eyed me. "I'm not waiting for you," he told me. It was his way of saying that he would wait, but to hurry up. Eddy was funny like that.

"That's fine. This could take a while. I'll see you later, then." That was my way of telling him, _no, that's fine, go on without me_.

I swear I need a translation book for each of my friends. Its only fair, I suppose, since I believe they need one for me as well. Eddy shrugged and sauntered out the door, hands stuffed into his pockets.

Turning back, I found our teacher with an expression of despair and resignation on her face as she began shifting through the massive pile. I glanced around, my mind automatically processing the 23 class-drawn pictures and 14 pictures of landscapes (7 of the United States, 5 in Europe, mainly the UK, Germany and France, but there was an Italy, and two of China). "Miss?" I spoke up once I noticed that she hadn't realized I was still there. She jumped, startling the pile and I leapt forward to steady it before it toppled onto the floor.

"Thank you, Eddward," she said, straightening her glasses and starting to reorganize the newly acquired mountain on her desk. "Is there something else I can help you with?"

I hesitate, noting how her hair was sticking out at odd angles from the half-hearted bun at the back of her head, the dark lines under her eyes and her rumpled clothing. The teacher looked overworked and I worried about adding more weight. I had made a commitment, however, and I couldn't go on without her.

Which actually sounded weird, when put like that.

"Yes, Miss, actually." We call our teacher Miss, with no last name. For some unknown reason when she first introduced herself to us in class she had a mini-lecture about the differences between 'Ms', 'Miss', and 'Mrs'. If you don't actually know, the differences are simple. A woman who is called 'Mrs' in front of their surname is married, a 'Miss' is not, while 'Ms' either was formerly married, or they don't want to label themselves as on or off the market. Don't ask me the inner workings of the female mind. This is actually a perfect example of how differently a man and a woman's minds work. A man can take the honorific 'Mr' and be satisfied, however, a woman not only categorizes, but adds a 'Misc' label. As our teacher was not married, never had been, and had no shame in hiding it, she asked that she would be referred to as 'Miss'. So she was. Children are uncomplicated like that.

"I was recently hired as Kevin's tutor for the summer to give him a more focused and personalized lesson plan over the information from this last year, but to do so, I will need your help."

"Really?" Miss folded her hands in interest, "I was under the impression that Kevin's parents were enrolling him in summer school."

"They were. However, they reconsidered and thought that maybe a tutor could give him better results than a class that he could just fall asleep in. Theoretically, of course. You know how summer courses are."

"Yes," she smiled slightly. "What did you have in mind? I'm sure you are fully capable in some areas, however the working environment of a classroom is useful because a certified teacher is right there and could answer questions that you couldn't."

The idea that I couldn't answer any question Kevin put to me had not occurred to me.

"Also, have you considered the lab aspects of the chemistry class? There's no way I could condone the illegal practice of two minors with dangerous chemicals in an unsupervised environment."

I probably worked with more dangerous chemicals every day than our chemistry teacher does in the whole year. But I can't mention that. As she said, it isn't exactly legal. I considered the problem. "How about on some of the more difficult lab works we could use the classroom? I'm sure Ms. Hafnium wouldn't mind."

Ms. Hafnium was the chemistry teacher. I swear the woman lives in her classroom.

"What did you have in mind?"

"Well, I was thinking that you could provide me a copy of the summer's syllabus and I could use it as a guide and create lesson plans from that. On the lessons that require more adult supervision than a parent we could come in after the summer class' day is over and Ms. Hafnium could supervise."

Miss considered. "Well, I can't agree without talking to her. I'm here until Saturday, how about I get hold of you tomorrow with a syllabus? Is that acceptable?"

"Yes, Miss!"

I could feel my nerves thrumming in anticipation. It really had been too long since I got the opportunity to tutor anyone.

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I was buried in my lab when the call came late Friday afternoon. There is a guest bedroom in my house in which I had converted into a lab. The door is locked at all times, only I having the key. It drives Eddy insane. Whenever he comes over to my house he'll always find a way to pass by the closed door and he'll glare at it. One time I even found him trying to pick the lock. After that I added a dead-bolt on the other side. No offense to Eddy, but there are some very dangerous chemicals in that room that should not be in reach of Eddy and Ed.

Also, the room is a little like a sanctuary for me. In this room, time no longer exists, only compounds, equations, and the acidic scent of chemicals. While I am in this room, I am not in a large, empty house, nor is my mind constantly running through worries and anxieties. I am able to push all that aside to focus on the task at hand.

Which was why I was in that room on Friday. I said goodbye to Eddy a few hours earlier as they left for the weekend. Ed was already confined to his basement, and my stomach was clenched with nerves over the weeks to come. When I found myself cleaning the same counter for the third time that day, I forced myself to throw the rag into the bucket of sanitizer and go to my lab.

When the call came I was gloved-hands deep into a very delicate mixture. It took several rings for me to notice and several more for me to set everything aside carefully before picking up the phone.

"Eddward, Double-D speaking."

"_Eddward, this is your teacher."_

Immediately, the equations that had been running through my mind scattered. "Oh! Hello, Miss!"

"_Hello. I spoke with Ms. Hafnium earlier. She agreed with your idea and thought maybe next Thursday you and Kevin could come meet for the first experiment and to set up some ground rules."_

I frowned slightly. Sometimes it is really frustrating being a kid. I probably could have quoted safety regulations from fifteen different texts from ten different states and five different countries. However, Miss didn't know that and it wasn't worth the fight to try and explain it to her.

"That sounds fine, Miss. Thank you very much!"

_"Not a problem, Eddward. I was going to give you the syllabus then, is that acceptable?"_

I fiddled with the cord of the phone, slightly disappointed that I couldn't get started right away. "Yes, Miss. That sounds perfect," I said brightly.

After saying our goodbyes, I hung up, standing over the phone for a long moment, my fingers tapping out an obscure rhythm. Picking the phone back up, I dialed Kevin's number.

"_Speak."_

I blinked, startled. "H-hello?"

I heard a slight sigh from over the phone. "_Hey Double-D."_

"Kevin? How did you know it was me?"

"_I'm psychic. What's up?"_

"Oh, um, I was wondering if you wanted to come over on Wednesday to get started."

"_Wednesday_?"

Sudden panic flooded me and I stuttered, "O-or I could come over there. It doesn't matter, really. I was just thinking here might be easier because I have all my books, but I could easily take them over there."

"_Double-D_!_ Shut up! Your place is fine. Probably better anyway because my mom would be hovering if we were over here."_

"Ah, I see. So, is Wednesday adequate?"

"_It's fine. What time? I've got something in the morning so it'll have to be after lunch_."

"After lunch is fine."

A slight pause before, "_Your dork friends better not be hanging around, Double-D. I mean it._"

"Pardon?" Something caught my eye and I glanced over at my lab table. Smoke was billowing out of one of my beakers, foam pushing up the sides towards the lip of the glass. "Oh! I have to call you back, Kevin!" Without waiting for a response, I threw the phone onto its holder and raced over to the table, yanking my gloves and mask on.

Oh dear! I left it too long, the mixture settled without the final chemical. Running to the window, I threw it open to let the poisonous gas out before I focused on correcting my error before it exploded.

Carefully leaning in, I angled an eyedropper over the mixture, three beads of yellow liquid dropping in. The moment the last drop landed the liquid expanded in a burst of white fumes. Coughing, struggling not to inhale, I threw myself to the window and breathed deeply.

Two hours and a very thorough cleaning later, I slumped on my couch in relief. My head spun slightly from the fumes, but all-in-all it was too close. I was very stupid to leave it out so long, it could have easily caused a great deal of damage. The gas was scentless, so I could have passed out and possibly died without the room being properly ventilated.

Stupid.

I was lying down, a cool cloth pressed over my eyes when I heard the knocking. Groaning, I made as if to stand. The world spun and I staggered, catching myself on the coffee-table.

Woah, maybe I inhaled more of the fumes than I thought.

Breathing slowly, I made my way to the door. Oh, I feel like I'm going to pass out.

The door rattled as someone pounded on the other side. Gritting my teeth, I pulled it open, leaning heavily against the frame.

It was Kevin. Again. Although, he wasn't holding cookies, which was too bad, my light-headed mind told me, they were very good. All chewy. I like chewy cookies. Not as much as fresh brownies, where they are practically a paste and stick to your fingers and plate.

"A horrible mess though, right Kevin?"

"Double-D?" Kevin was staring at me, his eyebrows doing very interesting things. I grinned rather goofily at him.

"Hey, Kevin. I haven't helped tutor you yet, so isn't it a little early for desserts?"

Whoops.

The last thing I saw was the green of Kevin's eyes as my knees gave way.

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Ow.

"Double-D?"

My head.

"Oi, Double-D!"

That really, really hurts.

"Wake up!"

Something cold slapped against my face and I jerked upright. Regretting the movement immediately, I put my face in my hands and groaned. "I'm going to be ill."

I felt the cushions shift and my hands were directed around what felt like a trash can.

Lovely.

Hanging my head in shame, I cuddled it against my chest, ready for whenever my stomach rebelled.

I jumped slightly when something cold and damp was pressed against the back of my neck. Squinting around the pain, I glanced up. Kevin sat next to me, looking absorbed in wringing out a second cloth in a bowl of water. I considered speaking, but I knew the moment I opened my mouth I'd be ill.

Not really something I want Kevin to see.

Feeling pathetic, I tightened my grip on the trash can, noting it was empty and clean. Thank God, since I think the smell could have tipped the scales.

"How are you feeling?" Kevin asked suddenly. Looking up, I caught the strangely intense look in his eyes as he pressed a hand over my forehead. My face heated up, pushing his hand away and shook my head.

"What happened? First you hang up on me and then I look outside and see you hanging out your window with a bunch of smoke pouring out. You never called me back."

He sounded angry. Just what I needed, an upset Kevin on top of everything else. The now-warm cloth on my neck was removed and replaced with a fresh one. Frowning, I stared at him.

"K-Kevin?" I croaked. My throat felt cracked and raw. This keeps getting better and better.

Kevin busied himself with soaking the cloth for a long moment. "I have a little sister. She lives with my Dad in Pennsylvania. When we were young I used to take care of her when she was sick."

Unable to stop the small grin, I hid my head. "Thanks," I murmured, and coughed.

He humph-ed, and set the bowl on the table. "I'll get you some water."

After he disappeared into the kitchen, I curled myself tighter into the couch. Well, this was certainly new. I can't remember the last time someone took care of me. It left a strange feeling in my stomach.

I'm not sure if I like it. It's too unfamiliar.

Still, it was very… sweet of him. I hid a grin. Yes, Kevin was being sweet. Who knew those two words could be in a sentence together without some unraveling of the universe as we know it.

Or maybe it was.

My head hurt.

"Here," Kevin thrust a glass under my nose. Taking it gratefully, I took a sip, enjoying the sensation of it soothing my aching throat.

"Better?"

I nodded.

"Good. Now, what happened?"

Clearing my throat a few times, I played with the rim of the trash can. "I was working on a somewhat delicate experiment earlier when Miss called. It was a rather dangerous component to leave out but safe enough for a few minutes. Unfortunately, I got distracted and forgot about it, and when I turned around, I saw that it was starting to smoke. That's why I hung up on you, Kevin. I needed to balance the chemicals or else it would have been disastrous.

"However, I fear that I manage to inhale a fair amount of fumes before the end. That's why I passed out."

I stared down at my hands, embarrassed beyond belief at my own stupidity.

Kevin stared at me. "That was dumb."

"Yeah, I know," I hung my head.

"Really, really dumb."

"Yes."

"Extraordinarily dumb."

I frowned. "I realize that, Kevin."

"Seriously. You could have died."

"I know."

"I thought you were smarter than that, Double-D."

I glowered. Not helping here, Kevin. "What do you care?" I snapped. It wasn't as if it really mattered if I died anyway. It would probably be the only time my parents would take out for me.

"If you die, who will tutor me?" Kevin said without missing a beat. I gaped at him. Flushing with anger, I set the glass down with a thump. "Your concern is overwhelming," I said icily.

Kevin turned to me, startled. The look vanished as quickly as it came, irritation clear on his face. "Well, what did you expect? It's not like I really care what happens to you, Double-_dork_."

My eyes narrowed. "I can see that. Thank you very much, Kevin, for protecting your interests. As you can see, I'm fine, so you are welcome to see yourself out."

Kevin stood abruptly, the bowl sloshing water on the table. "That's _fine _with me. I'll see you around."

"Wednesday," I confirmed. "Don't want your investments to be worthless."

"Fine!" Yanking his ball-cap down on his head, he stormed out, not even bothering to put on his shoes, only grabbing them and slamming the door shut behind him.

Glaring at the door, I threw the cloth from my neck violently into the bowl.

Sitting back, I sighed, putting my head in my hands.

Well, that went well.

* * *

A/N: Thank you so much for your patience! Please view my profile for more info, or my LJ for previews, random bits, or whatever else that may catch my fancy. 


	5. Chapter 5: UnderstandingsMisconceptions

**Chapter Five**

**Understandings and Misconceptions**

**H**ello, three a.m. I truly hate this time of day when I have no distractions. I occasionally have trouble sleeping, but when I am back in my house distraction is easily obtained through the many books and puzzles in my room. Unfortunately, Ed believes in sleepovers. One of Ed's favorite things is for Eddy and myself to stay up all night and inflict upon us his comic book collection or the monster movie marathon on television.

I certainly don't mind. In fact, I love these evenings spent with my friends. It's a glimpse into a childhood world that I have missed up until that point. Ed is a wonderful person and through him I see that there is innocence and kindness in the world, even if that world is also filled with twisted monsters that lurk beneath the bed.

Evenings spent at Ed's are the ones that make every other evening spent curled up in my sleeping bag shivering and counting the notches of the zipper at Eddy's at three a.m. worth it.

It was strange that I should find myself again in that position, the day had been fine. Nothing unusual had happened to set off an attack of nerves like the one I currently experienced.

One would think that the argument with Kevin a few days ago would have caused such an attack. The funny thing was that despite the argument with Kevin, I couldn't help but feel anxious for Wednesday to arrive. I had slept most of the residual effects of the fumes off and for the rest of the weekend I buried myself in the long process of organizing the information that Kevin and I would go through. Even though I didn't have the syllabus, I remembered enough of the year that I was able to write out a couple of prototype tests that would be easy to change to gear towards Kevin's ability as I became more aware of it.

All-in-all, when Monday came around and Eddy started pounding at my door, I was surprised to see the weekend gone.

It had been nice, spending time with Eddy and Ed again. I adore running around outside with my friends without a care in the world beyond keeping Eddy's greed from getting too out of control. When I lived in the city, I never got that chance. It was dangerous for children to be by themselves, and as I had no real friends I was more often than not stuck inside.

Which could explain my ineptitude when it comes to physical activities, come to think of it.

I saw Kevin once or twice on Monday, but he kept his distance, refusing to taunt us even when Jimmy's mouth brace got stuck in the boat engine and Sara chased us around before going back to help him.

There is a part of me that is concerned for the future for Jimmy's sake, but I'm not supposed to know those words yet, so I try not to think about it too much.

After lunch it rained, so we adjourned to Eddy's house, as Ed's basement seemed to invent new types of stink whenever it rained. However, the new species of mold found there is interesting, if one didn't think about it too much.

Toeing off my shoes as we entered, I winced as I saw Eddy and Ed trod uncaringly in their muddy shoes across the carpeted living room. _Not my house_, I told myself, _don't make a scene._ Still, I kept my vision firmly above the line of carpet as we made our way to Eddy's room.

"How was your weekend, Eddy?" I asked. Now that the business portion of the day was over, we could speak more normally.

"It was fine," Eddy waved me off.

I wasn't fooled and pushed on, "What did you do?"

"We went skiing. It was freaking cold, and my legs hurt like hell, but it was a lot of fun. You should have seen the fall my dad took. Straight, face-first into the snow! We were getting off the lift, right, and you gotta get off just right, but Dad missed and wham!" Eddy smacked his hands together, "Mouthful of snow!"

We laughed at the image, Eddy clutching his sides in memory of the event. With little prodding needed, we got Eddy to tell all his adventures of that weekend. Eddy glowed under our rapt attention, his arms gesticulating widely in his enthusiastic story-telling. After one fairly violent swipe of his arms through the air to describe the sudden turns down the mountain, Eddy twisted and disappeared off the edge of the bed.

Ed and I laughed so hard that I had to cover my mouth with my hands in a desperate effort to stop or else I feared I'd pass out from lack of breath.

It was a wonderful evening.

So it was odd to find myself balled up beneath my sleeping bag, hands held tight against my chest as though I were manually trying to calm my frantic heart-beat.

I wish there were some way I could describe to you my mind-process during these panic attacks. I could try, but words cannot convey the depth of emotion that goes into it. It's a sense of claustrophobia, having run a long distance, and losing a best-friend all rolled into one moment. It can be set off by just about anything.

In this case, I was simply thinking about how I missed spending time with my friends like this. We spend so much time scheming that I often wonder if Eddy truly saw us as friends or as business associates.

It was contemplating this that I realized that I was more comfortable with the latter than the former.

Let me try to explain.

I am terrified of dependence. It's an old understanding of humanity that our race fears what we don't understand. To me, dependence is one of those things. I look at Eddy and Ed and their dependence on their parents and even while a part of me longs for it, I fear it. It is something so beyond my scope of experience that I cannot even fathom what it is like to have that support, to have that unconditional love.

It is why it is easy for me to accept indifference. To me, its easier for people like Kevin to simply ignore me than to actively hate me. The mindless cruelty of a bully is preferable than the meticulous brutality of someone who cares. Someone who cares has reason to actively destroy you.

Yes, mindless cruelty is something I can live with. I understand it, because I know it intimately.

So, when I think of Eddy, a part of me would rather he think of me as a casual acquaintance rather than a friend because then he wouldn't feel as invested to care enough to hurt me. I've never had real friends before Eddy and Ed. I don't know how I would handle it.

And that scares me more than I care to admit.

Tuesday morning dawned while I still lay in my sleeping bag, eyes burning from lack of sleep. Around six-thirty a.m., I gave up and got dressed. While I waited for the others to wake, I kept myself busy by straightening Eddy's room. I've done this often enough that I knew where most of it went and what areas to avoid, like the box under the bed.

I wonder if Eddy likes having sleepovers because I end up cleaning his room?

No matter, it helped keep my mind off things and by the time Eddy woke up, I had calmed down significantly. It's not like they don't know about my panic attacks, in fact, they have both seen one a time or two. However, none of us were comfortable talking about it. Me, because I felt so vulnerable during those times, and the others… well, I imagine because they didn't know what to do. That was okay, I didn't know either.

"Good morning, Eddy!" I said, putting the last of the books on the newly organized shelf.

Eddy yawned widely, presenting me his gaping mouth in a very unflattering way.

"Cover your mouth when you yawn," I told him in a disgusted tone.

Eddy glowered through sleep-covered eyes. "'S'too early to be nit-picking, Double D."

"It's 9:00, Eddy."

"Like I said." Turning, Eddy buried his head beneath his colorfully-designed pillow. Eddy's decorative-sense wouldn't have been out-of-place in one of those Magic Eye pictures., where you have to stand back and cross your eyes to see anything beyond seemingly random designs. Eddy was a fan of antiques and classics. He seemed to find attachments to objects and ideas that stand the test of time, even if its only from the 70s.

"What time you get up?" came Eddy's voice through the pillow.

"About seven."

"…You sleep?"

I hesitated. "Some."

Eddy pulled the pillow off his head and chucked it at me. "Ya don't havta come over if it makes you so uncomfortable."

Ah, he's noticed that I have never had any attacks at Ed's.

"I like coming over."

He glared at me. "Go home, get some sleep. I'll think up a scam and we can get started this afternoon. I'll take care of Lumpy."

I nodded. This wasn't the first time that I was sent home to sleep after a night-over. Of course, I never slept. Sleeping during the day was for toddlers and babies. I could spend the morning getting ready for Kevin's first lesson tomorrow.

The rest of the morning passed quickly, my attention so diverted by my lesson plans that it wasn't until I heard Eddy beating on the door that I noticed that it was the afternoon..

Eddy appeared to be rejuvenated after his vacation and threw himself, and us, into his newest scam. One that he announced would be the _"Scam of all scams, and don't roll your eyes at me, Double D! I mean it this time!"_

I was just heading off to the junkyard for some spare wood when, imagine my surprise, I caught sight of Kevin waving me down.

"Hey, Double-D! C'mere!"

Curiosity pricked at me as I approached. It couldn't be that he was still mad about Friday, could it? He didn't seem to be wearing that strange smirk of his when he was about to pummel one of us. Still, I stopped a few feet away from him, sitting on his bike with his elbows across his handlebars.

"Look, Kevin, about Friday-"

"Don't worry about it," he cut me off.  
I shook my head. "No, really, Kevin. I'm sorry. You were just being nice and I acted like a complete jerk."

To my surprise, Kevin laughed.

"What?"

"Nothing," he snickered. "Just- I guess we sorta switched roles, didn't we?"

"Yes, I suppose we did."

"Are you saying I'm a complete jerk?"

"I-wait, um. You," I stuttered, panicked.

"Hey, relax. I'm only joking Listen, about tomorrow-"

"What about it?" I asked, nerves attacking me once again. Was he lying and he really was insulted about Friday and decided to drop my tutoring him? Did his parents change their mind about a kid teaching their son?

"Can we have it at a different time? I got some chores I need to do after lunch."

"Oh! Sure! No problem. I mean, yes, that's fine," I said, relief evident in my tone. As I thought further on it I realized it would be easier to duck Eddy and Ed if it were later too. I hadn't thought of that. I smiled.

"About five?"

"Sounds good. I'll see you then, Double D."

Nodding to him, I fought back a strange urge to wave as he rode off. Crossing my hands behind my back, I turned to find Eddy and Ed glaring at me from over a nearby fence. Well, Eddy was glaring. Ed was sort of blinking at me.

My well-tuned Eddy-sense told me to tread carefully. Kevin and Eddy have never gotten along to my knowledge. He took it as a personal affront when any of the kids spoke to Kevin. I shudder to think how he would react if he found out I volunteered to help him. I called up an easy grin from my collection as I met them.

Unimpressed, Eddy upped his glare to a scowl. "What the hell was that about?!"

"What? Oh," I thought quickly. "Kevin just wanted to ask me about the time," I said and smiled.

* * *

It was beautiful. The straight lines, sharp angles, and pristine white perfectly contrasted by the bold type ordered perfectly across the page. Ten pages, all aligned exactly with a staple in the left-hand corner that formed with the edges of the paper a perfect right triangle.

Kevin stared down at the papers I held out to him, pride and excitement filling my chest. His expression registered surprise, but was quickly turning into one as though I were holding out something repulsive, like a bug, or boiled spinach.

I hate boiled spinach.

"What is this?" he growled, his nose crinkling up.

"I want to see how well you remember our lessons of last year. With this I'll be able to determine what exactly we need to focus on so you don't waste time learning something you already know," I explained patiently.

Kevin's eyes searched mine. "You're not joking, are you?"

I smiled, lips stretched thin over my teeth. "I'm not."

He sighed explosively and snatched the papers out of my hand, his hands crushed them slightly as he flipped the pages roughly.

"Kevin, I-" I began in automatic protest of the care he was treating them, but I stopped myself in time. No need to get into a fight over something so small. Kevin looked up anyway and glared.

"What?!"

Smiling benignly, I held out my other hand, "Pencil?"

He took the pencil from me and plopped down at the desk I had steered us to when I first welcomed him in. As he started flipping through the pages, I decided it would be for the best if I busy myself elsewhere while he worked.

It was late-afternoon. We met late enough that Eddy and Ed wouldn't have been too suspicious about my abrupt departure from their company, but early enough that I agreed that Kevin would have dinner at my place after carefully explaining to his mother upon her questioning that my parents were working late that night, but I was perfectly capable of making dinner just for the two of us.

"I'm sure you can, dear," she had said, a knowing twinkle in her eye. "Try not to have too many sweets."

I had only smiled, knowing most kids our age would use such an opportunity to indulge in junk food. I considered it briefly, just for the novelty of seeing Kevin's face at the spread, but decided against it. Too many sweets would make us both sick and the last thing I need is an ill, grumpy Kevin on my case. Especially after what happened last time when I was ill and grumpy.

I excused myself into the kitchen and began pulling out ingredients. I had decided earlier that day that the simpler the meal, the better, as I had little clue of Kevin's likes and dislikes. Pizza would probably be a safest choice. Besides, it had been a while since I got to make home-made pizza. The last time was for Eddy and Ed the only time I tried a sleep-over at my place.

I kept it at one because parents liked knowing that there was some kind of parental supervision and I couldn't keep lying and expect not to be caught out at some point. Better to be careful.

I began preparing the dough, it was an easy enough task that my mind wandered a bit as I worked.

I had woken that morning with my heart in my throat, knowing what today was. I had deviated from my self-appointed bed-time and had stayed up nearly to two a.m. working on the papers that Kevin now held possession of. The hands of my clock pointed at a little past ten, which was late for me. I had spent the remainder of the morning puttering around the house getting things ready.

I hoped that the afternoon would fly by, however, Einstein's ghost seemed to have decided to play havoc and time dragged nearly to a stand-still. I soon found myself in that horrible trap where you glance at the clock every few seconds and then wonder why it has been 1:43 for the past five minutes. A little after two, Eddy came hammering at my door, wondering loudly why I hadn't met them after lunch like we agreed. Apologizing, I told him I had simply gotten caught up in one of my experiments.

I wonder if I'm a hypocrite that I am able to lie so easily about the big things but so badly when its small things. I really hate lying, I really do, so I made it a rule for myself to only ever lie when I have to. I promised Kevin, and I keep my promises.

Really. Sometimes I wonder if my promises are the only thing I really have.

After Eddy dragged me out of the house it got a little better. We didn't do much, Ed had gotten a new comic book and he insisted on sharing it with us in detail. I had to laugh at the sheer ridiculousness of it. Hamsters in outer-space? I mean, come on! While Ed read slowly aloud to us, Eddy chowed down on sweets while I scribbled in my notebook, observing the next stages of the strange growths on Ed's mattress. If I didn't know better, I would say they were getting ready to bloom. Oh dear.

As four-thirty rolled around, I announced vaguely about a project I was working on. Eddy made a non-committal noise, but Ed looked up with wide, pleading eyes. "Double D, you can't go! We're about to find out what happens to Spudsy when he goes up against the _Alien Space Monster_!" and promptly began reading again. You have to hand it to Ed. He may not be the quickest reader, but he sticks with it and truly enjoys himself. That's something I like having in common with him. About five minutes later, I repeat my comment and Ed looks up again, "You can't go _yet_, Double D! The _Alien Space Monster_ is about to do something quite _di-a-bolical!_" He pronounced 'diabolical' as though its very meaning dripped off the syllables.

This process repeated itself several times, until 4:55, when Eddy finally snapped. "Fine! Just go! Anything to make you two shut up!" He lasted a session longer than I expected, but still, mission accomplished.

I made it back to my house to find Kevin hovering behind the bushes by my front door. I stared at him as he coughed in embarrassment. "You look ridiculous." It fell out of my mouth without bothering to stop in at my brain for permission. Inwardly, however, I fully agreed. Kevin had changed clothes, he was wearing a camo-shirt and dark-tan shorts, the effect of concealment totally ruined by the same bright-red cap he always wore. There was, however, twigs stuck in it.

He glared at me and hissed. "Shut up and open the door."

_Sorry, I couldn't hear you what with you being stealth and all. _Grinning widely, I fought not to laugh as I jingled through my keys slightly longer than necessary.

"This is so embarrassing!" Kevin grumbled as I finally located my key.

_Ahh! Who said that? Oh no! It's ninja-Kevin!_ "Hard to see why," I said, my voice pleasantly even.

"Hurry up, I don't exactly want to be seen with you, if you couldn't tell."

Turning the lock, I opened the door, entirely too amused to take offense. "You get seen with me all the time, Kevin. It's as though we're neighbors."

"_Howdy, neighbor_." Kevin shoved his way past me and, after ducking so the door blocked him from being seen outside, took off his shoes. I couldn't help it, I laughed.

"I've finished. What's that smell?"

I jumped from where I had seated myself after putting the pizza in the oven. I was aware that I had been wearing a rather dopey grin and Kevin glared, obviously guessing at where my mind had been.

I cleared my expression the best I could. "Home-made pizza?"

His glare faltered. Eyes moving around the kitchen, they passed over the leavings of my work. "We could have just ordered out," he said in an odd tone.

"Yees," I said slowly. "But I also could make it."

He stared at me. "Why?"

"Because cooking is a skill everyone should learn."  
"No, why did you make pizza?"

"You don't like pizza?" I said, jumping up as surprise was quickly overcome by guilt. I should have asked first! Gah! I'm so stupid!

"No! I like pizza!"

Frowning, I put my hands on my hips, forgetting that I had flour on my hands. "Then what exactly is the problem?"

"It's- Nothing. Forget it."

"No. What is it? It's just half cheese, half pepperoni. You're not lactose-intolerant are you? But you've had milk at school. Are you allergic to pepperoni? It's only on half of it. I used peanut oil. Are you allergic to peanuts?"

"I'm not allergic to any of that!" Kevin shouted, his hands moved in a sharp gesture. Stepping back, I eyed him warily.

Kevin jerked his face away, yanking his cap to the side and back a few times. "I just… You didn't need to cook."

Confusion mottled my face. "I know. I wanted to."

Silence for a while, Kevin still glaring at a spot on the floor. I glanced down, checking for any dirt I may have missed. "Why?" Kevin's voice was harsh.

_Because it has been a long time since I've gotten to cook for anyone but me,_ is what I didn't say. I gave the other reason. "It gave me something to do while you worked." He looked at me, so I gave him my best smile. The one I used for adults when they ask too many questions. Kevin seemed to deflate slightly.

"Right, okay." He pulled himself up. "I've finished."

"That was quick," I said as I moved to wash my hands.

"There was some stuff I didn't even know how to start, so I left it blank. Um?"

"Yes?"

"Uh, nothing."

I glanced over my shoulder to find Kevin eying the ceiling with a definite smirk on his face. Right. I turned back around. "I expected it to take longer, to be honest. I thought supper would be ready first. If you want I can go ahead and look over what you have?"

"Well, that _is _the idea of this, isn't it?"

"If you continue to take that wry tone with your tutor, I'll-"

"You'll _what_?" Kevin jerked his cap backwards and crossed his arms threateningly.

"I'll tell Ms. Hafnium tomorrow that you're a little confused on the chemical safety rules and have her go through it all, in _detail_."

Kevin's arms uncrossed, "Okay, one," he held up a finger, "That's just cruel, and two," the other came up, "what's this about tomorrow?"

"Oh!" My hands flew up to my mouth. "I completely forgot to tell you, didn't I?"

"Just a bit."

"Ah, well. My apologies! Well, I talked to Miss about my tutoring you to see if I could get a copy of the syllabus in order to get an idea of what to work on. She mentioned how there is some lab-work that would need to be supervised by an adult. Ms. Hafnium said she could help out on Thursdays." I shrugged as if to say '_adults, eh?_'

Kevin sighed and rubbed his temples. "What time?"

What… time? I stared blankly at him. Oh my goodness… I _completely _forgot to call Ms. Hafnium about the time! It's entirely too late to call her now! Oh no! What am I going to do?!

"H-hey!"

It's not as if I can call her in the morning! And by the afternoon, it might be too late for her to get things ready. Or what if Kevin is busy in the late afternoon and can only go in early? That'll give her no time! We can't just show up! Oh no, I can't believe I forgot. This is so irresponsible of me.

Just as my inner-spiral was about to sink me into depression, my shoulders were taken in a hard grip. "Hey!"

Dazed, I looked up. "I'm so sorry, Kevin."

"Ah, sh-. It's _fine_, you dork. It doesn't matter if you forgot."

"But Ms. Hafnium-"

"Ms. Hafnium is so scatter-brained that she probably wouldn't have been ready if you had called her a month ago. Don't worry about it. I'll call her tomorrow."

I drew myself up to protest, "But-"

"_I'll call her_."

My head dropped. "Right."

"Geez, don't take everything so seriously. Mistakes are allowed sometimes, y'know?" He cuffed the back of my head lightly. When I looked up in surprise, he had his back turned with both his hands shoved into his pockets.

"Kevin?"

"Yeah?"

"You've still got a twig in your hair."

"Yeah, well. You've got flour on your shirt."

_What?!_ My hands flew to my shirt and lo, two white-hand prints adorned my normally pristine shirt. Just as suddenly, my panic faded as I became aware of a sound I had never heard before. Kevin was laughing. It wasn't his normal, jeering laugh, but a full one, his whole body shaking with it.

"Oh… my… god, Double D," he said between laughs, "You're such a _girl _sometimes."

Well! "Just for that," I said, marching past him and upstairs to change, "Ms. Hafnium is going to site every single safety rule in the book."

His laughter continued behind me.

Jerk.

End of Chapter 5

* * *

A/N: Thank you EVERYONE for being so incredibly patient. As you can see, this story is NOT dead, I'm just really slow. However, let's hope my New Years Resolution will help. Please view my profile for more info about this chapter and future progress.


	6. Chapter 6: Misconceptions and Teachings

**Chapter 6**

**Misconceptions and Teachings **

**W**hen I came down from changing a few minutes later, Kevin was bent over the writing desk scribbling furiously. Still slightly miffed, I ignored him in favor of checking on dinner. It was a good thing that I did, the edges were just turning the darker side of brown. With quick hands, I pulled the pizza out and set it to cool with a slight flourish. I always enjoyed cooking but I found that cooking for someone else made the experience that much more.

I had grown used to Ed, who had sort of a sixth sense for when food was ready, so when Kevin didn't immediately appear I peeked out into the other room. He remained hunched over, concentrating. Not one to interrupt someone they were when working so hard, I waited. In the meantime, I cleaned up. When I finished, I sat for a few more minutes before I gave in.

Poking my head around the door, I said, "Kevin? Supper's ready," then mentally flinched at how that resembled a house-wife.

Fortunately, either Kevin didn't notice or chose not to comment. He stood up, stretching slightly before turning. His face wore his familiar smirk of smug satisfaction. It made me immediately suspicious. It was the same look he had when we were pinned in a corner and he was just winding up for the first punch.

Trying my best to force back any unpleasant flashbacks, I gave him an arch look. "You look pleased with yourself. Any particular reason why?"

Kevin's smirk twisted into something resembling a smile before reverting back. "I remembered how to do one of the problems."

"Oh?" I blinked. "That's great!" So, Kevin's satisfied face wasn't only for bullying us, but for stuff like that as well. That was nice to know. Though, it was odd that he tried not to smile about it. Maybe being pleased wasn't the same as being satisfied.

There I go, psychoanalyzing him again. Well, to be fair, he was a bit of a dichotomy. Case in point, his relationship with the other kids. With them, Kevin isn't that bad a guy. I wonder if he behaved similarly as he was doing now with the other kids and that's why he's so popular. I mean, he was always awful to us, by 'us' I refer to Ed, Eddy, and myself, but the other kids have always seemed very willing to follow him when he planned parties or took a stand. Now that I think about it, I don't think I've really seen Kevin act all that cruelly to the other kids. Just us, and from what I understand, this had gone on before I arrived. Was it Eddy? Kevin never really focused much on Ed, and I imagine Ed's head was so up in the clouds it would be rather pointless to make fun of him. Myself, well, we could clearly get along at times. What was it about Eddy that Kevin found so distasteful? His behavior? His scams?

I could ask Eddy, but I suspect that's a landmine type of conversation. I did wish I understood them. If only so that it would be easier for me to deal with them.

"Hungry?" I asked, gesturing him towards the kitchen.

"Starving," Kevin replied with a nod. Tossing the pencil on the desk, he walked past me into the kitchen.

"Hey, this isn't half bad," Kevin said a few minutes later after taking his first bite of pizza.

"Thank you, Kevin." I set two glasses of milk in front of our places at the table then returned to my own chair in front of him.

"You made this from scratch?"

"I did."

Kevin peeled off a pepperoni slice and popped it into his mouth. "Even the pepperoni?"

"Oh, goodness no!" I laughed. "It would take weeks to cure the meat for a pepperoni sausage! I don't think pizza would require that much planning ahead. I bought that."

Kevin made a face. "Yeah, that would be a little scary, Double D. Even for you."

I huffed, a small smile playing across my lips. "So I'm scary now?"

"Of course."

I raised an eyebrow, "Do I scare you, Kevin?"

He scoffed. "Of course not. Nothing scares me." Sticking his chest out, Kevin preened so exaggeratedly that I laughed.

"Of course not, Kevin. So, how am I scary then?"

"Not scary as in frightening, but more like 'Wait, how old is this kid, again?'"

"Ah, so I'm mature for my age." Nothing new there.

"Sure."

I cleaned my fingers on my napkin. "What does that mean?"

"What?"

I kept the conversation light by tilting my head and lifting both eyebrows. "That was a very placating 'sure'."

"Oh no," Kevin drawled. "That was a very agreeable 'sure'."

"Right."

"Right."

Our gaze locked for a long moment before we both grinned.

"Right then," Kevin said. "I can usually keep up with you because I can figure out what you mean by the context, but placating means…?"

"To mollify. Um. To soothe. In this case, in a rather mocking way."

"Ah good, thought it was something like that. Gotta say, Double D, even if you weren't tutoring me, just listening to you is a lesson in language comprehension."

"I'll take that as a compliment, Kevin," I said, offering him another piece of pizza. This time he took a cheese. I balanced him out and took my first pepperoni.

"You would," Kevin said with a smirk.

"Oh? Is it not?" I replied with a bit of playful haughtiness.

"It's simply you, Double D."

I blinked, staring at him. The way he said that was amused, almost fond. I ducked my head slightly and quickly took a bite.

The kitchen filled with the muffled sound of chewing. It was kind of gross, but any further conversation topics eluded me.

"So," Kevin said after draining the last of his milk. "Is there any lesson you are planning today?"

"Actually," I said, standing up. "I won't be getting the syllabus until we head up to the school tomorrow, so I thought I'd get an idea of what you remember with the questionnaire so I know what to focus on." Reaching into the pantry, I removed a plastic container and set it on the table. "Unless there is anything you would like to work on tonight?" I finished.

"Uh, no." Kevin bent forward to try and look through the frosted plastic. I grinned and pulled off the lid.

"Dessert?"

Kevin took in the ten leftover cookies from his mother laid neatly in the container with a slice of bread to keep them soft. He grinned. "Absolutely."

As I shut the front door behind Kevin about twenty minutes later, I let out a long sigh. No explosions, no battles, the night had gone relatively well. I smiled. Not only had it gone well, but I had a chance to see Kevin's face when something clicked in his head in the questionnaire. It made me even more excited for the weeks to come. Sure, there would be fights, I could not see any way around it, but I began to understand the determination teachers had with their students. I couldn't wait to get started.

The rest of the evening was taken up by grading Kevin's papers. He seemed to have a good handle on English and reading, and after what he said today that didn't surprise me. In History, he was fairly confident in names, but when it came to dates, the numbers were all jumbled. That pattern continued into the Mathematics and Chemistry sections. When it came to the theory, Kevin seemed to do well, it was when the equations came out that he seemed to get lost.

I was in the midst of trying to organize a method to help with this when the phone rang. Glancing at the clock, I noticed it was after ten. Wondering who would be calling me so late, I picked up the receiver.

"Hello, Eddward, Double-D speaking."

"_Hey, Double-D. It's Kevin."_

"Hello Kevin," I said in some surprise. "Did you forget something?"

"_No, I just got off the phone with Ms. Hafnium. She said she'll be in around nine tomorrow morning, and she'd be ready around 9:30, which I doubt, but yeah."_

"I'm sorry you had to call her so late. I hope you didn't interrupt anything."

Kevin snorted. "_Believe me, I doubt it was all that important."_

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

_"Nothing. Don't worry about it. So, nine-thirty tomorrow? Do you want to meet up first or just meet there?"_

"Oh? Aren't you worried about being seen, or are you going to be in stealth-gear if I say meet up first?"

_"Ha ha. It's early enough I doubt it'll be a problem to head over together."_

"So kind. We might as well meet up first. We'll be going the same route anyway. Say, ten after?"

_"Sounds good. I'll meet you at the park, then."_

Ah, so it was not early enough to just go to the front door. Kevin was strange.

"Very well. Be sure to bring a notebook and pencil of some kind. Good night, Kevin."

_"Night, Double D."_

_Nine o'clock, then?_ I thought as I hung up. That means I ought to wake up around seven so I can make breakfast, shower, and work on Kevin's paper some more. I glanced at the clock. In that case, it was bedtime for Double D. Tomorrow would be a busy day.

* * *

The next morning, I met Kevin right on time at the Peach Creek Park, which was about a five minute walk from my house. It's a small park, settled next to a concrete gutter that ran behind some of the houses before disappearing beneath the road. The park only contained a swing set, a 6x8 concrete square with a basketball hoop, and a jungle gym. It used to have a merry-go-round, but one of the parents thought that was dangerous and it got removed. Which was rather stupid, in my opinion. Kids get hurt, it didn't matter if the play equipment was made of wood or bubble-wrap, it will happen. If it was made of broken glass, I could see the point, but a merry-go-round? The only way to get hurt on that was if the kid either didn't hold on well enough, or jumped off wrong. Either way, the kid learned a valuable lesson and would be more careful next time.

When I arrived, Kevin was shooting some baskets with a basketball usually kept hidden at the park under some bushes near the gutter. I stood by and watched for a bit as Kevin shot and hit a couple more shots before one bounced off the rim. I ducked as it hit the ground next to me.

"Nice catch, Double D," Kevin said sarcastically, chasing after the ball.

"Sorry, Kevin. I'm just not a fan of objects flying at my head."

Lifting the ball casually in one hand, Kevin started back to me, a smirk appearing. "Can you even shoot a ball?"

"Not at all," I told him matter-of-factly. I knew my short-comings.

"Here," he offered the ball.

I stared at it as if it was going to bite. "You've got to be kidding."

"Not at all," he parroted. I glared. "Come on, Double D. It won't kill you to try it."

"My self-esteem will never be the same. Don't we need to get going?"

"Even if we arrive on time, I doubt she'll be ready until at least ten. What have you to lose? You already know you suck, so the only thing that would effect your self-esteem is actually making it."

Reluctantly, I took the ball. It was smooth from age and use, there was no way I would have a proper grip on this ball for even a decent attempt at a shot. "There's a difference between being theoretically bad at it and proving it." Still, I walked over until I was only two feet or so away from the basket. There was no way I was going to try dribbling. Setting my feet, I glanced at Kevin. He stood next to where he set his notebook with his arms crossed, waiting.

Right.

Before I throw this ball, I would like to make it clear that I have little to no arm strength. So the shot about to be described is the only way I could imagine it going any distance further than straight down.

I held the ball tightly between two hands and brought it between my knees. Then, with a mighty swing, threw the ball at the board. The ball left my hands in a perfect parallel to the ground for a few feet before it hit the ground rolling, continuing straight into the gutter.

"How's your self-esteem?" Kevin asked calmly.

"Smarting," I replied.

"I can imagine. Now, go get the ball, it's time to go."

"Me?! Do you know how disgusting it is down there?"

Kevin just shrugged. "You lost it, you get it. That's the rule."

I stared at him, but he remained unmoving. With a sickening feeling in my stomach, I reached into my back pocket and removed a pair of gloves. This was so unsanitary.

The water level in the gutter was low, only a trickle of about a foot across, and since it was concrete, there was enough traction that my trip down was fairly easy. The ball had rolled right in the middle of the water, a darker orange streak down the middle from the liquid. I picked it up carefully, trying to avoid the water. Turning around, I saw that Kevin had followed me and was standing at the top of the gutter with his hands held out.

"Toss it up."

I did so, Kevin catching it easily. He gave me an odd look for a moment before crouching down and offering me a hand. "It's a bit harder to get back up if you don't have a running start."

I'd have to agree with that, the angle had to be about 50 degrees. Not an easy one to walk up without some measure of momentum, or stronger legs than children have, let alone myself. I took the first few steps with relative ease, getting up high enough to reach Kevin's hand and took it. Between the two of us, I reached the top on the first try. No small thing, I'd watched the other kids play in the gutter making a game of running along up and down the sides. Getting back up from the bottom had taken all the kids a few tries from time to time, including Kevin, even when they have a running start from the other side.

Of course, I had never participated in such a thing, for one, it's very unsanitary, for another, Eddy was never interested in such games.

Kevin dusted off his hands while I snapped off the rubber gloves to place in the nearest trash receptacle. Kevin glanced at the gloves and said, "You're a strange one, Double D."

"Right back at you, Kevin."

Kevin blinked, "What?"

I straightened. "Alright. You've got your ball, now let's go. Whether or not Ms. Hafnium is ready is no excuse to be rude."

"Yessir," Kevin drawled.

We dropped the ball off in its regular hiding place. It wasn't much of a secret to the kids of the cul-de-sac. Mostly the purpose of it was to keep the kids from the other families in different areas, or the random drifter, from running off with it.

The walk to the school was done in relative silence, punctuated every so often by Kevin's yawn. When the school came into sight, I finally decided to ask, "Did you not get enough sleep?"

"Not really," Kevin shrugged. "I put off my chores last night until after I got back from your place, so I was up till about eleven finishing them."

"That's rather late. Do you have a lot of chores?" It seemed as though Eddy never had any chores. Although, Ed had his fair share along with the ones his sister piled onto him.

"Seems like it at times. But I was looking for something the other day and kinda tore up my room before I found it. Part of my grounding this summer is keeping my room clean."

"Oh, so you were grounded for your grades?" I suppose I assumed the tutoring made up for it.

"Yeah, not as bad as I thought though. Got more chores than I usually do, can't hang out with friends until Monday, and no TV for another week. Oh, and no dessert," he said the last with a mischievous grin.

I glared at him. "You cheater, you had five cookies yesterday."

He folded his hands behind his head with a smug look. "Oops, guess I forgot to tell you."

At the front of the building, I stopped and put my hands on my hips. "You think I won't have Ms. Hafnium do the full safety procedure on you, think again." I sniffed, and walked in.

"That's cruel and unusual punishment, Double D," Kevin called after me as I shut the door in his face. He was at my heels again after I'd only taken a few steps down the hall. "Tell you what, if you don't, I'll give you your pick of any jawbreaker in my garage."

"I'm not generally one to accept bribes, Kevin."

Kevin cut me off, crossing his arms in front of me. "But apparently you are one for blackmail."

"Fair point." I shot him a look. "Any jawbreaker… No matter how long it'll take?"

Kevin sighed, apparently remembering how fastidious I could be. "No matter how long it'll take," he agreed.

"It's a deal," I said, grinning. He smirked back briefly, before another yawn broke his face.

The school clock had just turned to 9:38 when we passed by. We arrived at the Chemistry lab not long after. The door was ajar, giving the view of seven long, black-stone tables, all but one of them clean with a fine glossy sheen from the open blinds of the six windows lined down the far wall. The last table was covered in Bunsen burners, beakers, flint sparkers, tubes, and bottles filled with variously labeled chemicals.

The room appeared empty until we stepped inside where we could see Ms. Hafnium at her desk, the view of which had been blocked by the door. The Chemistry teacher had short, sandy-blond hair, which was usually messy from her habit of running her hands through it when deep in thought. At the moment, she was holding her head in both hands, staring at the mass of papers in front of her, not having noticed us yet.

"Ms. Hafnium?" I said, just loud enough to be heard clearly, but not enough to be seen as impolite. She looked up, and I couldn't help but notice her wrinkled clothes and shadowed eyes. She was obviously tired or upset. Immediately, I felt guilty for interrupting her.

Starting to apologize, Kevin cut me off with a brisk, "I called last night about a tutoring session, Ms. Hafnium, remember?"

Ms. Hafnium stared at him, blinking slowly. "Ah, yes, right. Um." She looked around. "I'm afraid I'm not quite prepared. But, um. Just give me a few minutes."

I hid a sigh. Kevin was right, she had completely forgotten about it. Ah well. "Wait here, Kevin. I'll go see Miss and get the syllabus. I'll be right back."

He nodded and I quit the room just as I heard the rattle of glass as Ms. Hafnium nearly dropped a beaker.

_That was odd_, I thought as I headed down the hall. She wasn't usually clumsy. Scatterbrained, yes, she often tended to lose her place in her own lesson plans, but a clumsy Chemistry teacher was a danger to everyone in the room. I hope it wasn't due to whatever had obviously distressed her. Maybe a family member died. That would be awful, poor Ms. Hafnium. If that was the case, I'm sure we could have easily put off the lab for another week.

Yet, it was her decision as the adult whether or not she could handle the lesson. If she thought she couldn't then she could have easily just sent us away. There were no obligations here. Thus, she had to be confident in her ability to rise above whatever was bothering her. Certainly, I must have faith in her as a teacher to do the right thing.

Nodding to myself, I knocked at Miss' classroom. At the faint "Come in," I opened the door. Miss smiled upon seeing me and stood up. "Ah, Eddward, I'm surprised to see you so early. You've got good timing, I have just finished a syllabus I think would work well for you two." She pulled a few papers away from a file tray to her left and held them out to me. Taking a few steps, I accepted them with a nod.

"Thank you, Miss."

"Are you excited to get started?" she asked.

I nodded. "It should be an enlightening experience, Miss."

"I think you will do a great job."

I ducked my head, my cheeks heating. "Ah, thank you, Miss. I'm certainly going to do my best."

"See that Kevin does as well. That boy is a bit of a Smart Alek, but don't let him get away with half work."

"Yes, Miss."

"Alright, I see you're anxious to get started. Good luck, Eddward."

"Thank you, Miss."

As I was leaving, she called out, "Be sure to call me if you have any questions or problems. And I'm here on Mondays and Fridays during the summer, so feel free to stop in."

I nodded and thanked her again before slipping out the door.

When I returned to the lab, I saw Kevin had seated himself at the lab table nearest the front, his head propped up in his hand as he watched Ms. Hafnium messing with equipment. It looked like she only had it about halfway set up, so I joined Kevin, giving him a nod. He ignored me, his eyes tracking Ms. Hafnium's every move as she began fiddling with the flint sparker. I shrugged, and started flipping through the syllabus. Miss really seemed to know what Kevin needed to work on. There were several sections detailing Mathematics and very few on English. She had even written some lesson suggestions on different ways to present the information to Kevin. It was all very personalized and I should have felt very grateful, and I did, along with a little disappointed that she had made some suggestions that I hadn't even considered doing. Well, I guess I shouldn't be expected to think of everything. This was what teachers did for a li-

THUD! CRASH!

I jumped, papers flying from my hands as the loud sounds echoed through the room. Ms. Hafnium was on the floor, blood pooling around her head. Kevin crouched next to her, broken glass at his feet and clutching a hand that was quickly turning red and puckered.

Something clicked in my head.

_Ohmygodohmygodohmygod! What happened? Holy-!_

I found myself next to Kevin first. His face was white and sweat rolled down his cheeks. "Chemicals?" I asked. He nodded stiffly.

_Chemicals!Howdidthishappen?Ohmygod,this is bad! Oh nono!_

I stood in the chemical shower, shoving Kevin beneath it, yanking the cord to dump ice-cold water on him. "Keep under there," I ordered him.

_WhatdoIdo? This is bad-bad-bad! Ohmygodgodgod. _

I was at Ms. Hafnium's desk, grabbing the phone, dialing 9 to reach out of the building then 9-1-1. I remember speaking, I cannot recall the words.

I crouched next to Ms. Hafnium, kneeling to avoid the blood. The gibbering panic continued in the back of my head as the instructions I had memorized years ago in the case of an emergency began to play, my hands moving to follow them without conscious thought.

_Check the person's airway, breathing, and circulation. If necessary, begin CPR. _I felt a pulse and her breath was light, but present. It burned in my nose.

_If the person's breathing and heart rate were normal, but the person is unconscious, treat as if there is a spinal injury. _ I placed my hands on either side of her head, stabilizing it, and keeping it in line with the spine to prevent any movement. My palms were warmed by her blood.

_Stop any bleeding by firmly pressing a clean cloth on the wound._ Cloth, cloth… Moving a hand carefully away, I dug in my pocket for the handkerchief I always kept there. Folding it with one hand, I found where her head was the most matted with blood and put it against the spot as instructed. The thin material was quickly soaked through. _If the blood soaks through the cloth, do not remove it. Place another cloth over the first one._ No other cloth in sight.

Abruptly, I remembered something else. "Kevin!" I yelled over my shoulder, careful not to move my hands. "Strip!"

"Already did!" I heard him yell back from beneath the torrent of water. "How long do I have to stay under here again?!"

_For burns on arms or legs, place the burned area under running water for at least 15 minutes to flush off the chemical._ "Fifteen minutes!"

"Oh, you gotta be kidding me! It's freezing under here! How long has it been?"

I spotted a towel on the table above me, a dark stain on the corner of the hard surface catching my attention. She hit her head on that? Reaching up, I managed to drag the towel off and put it against the handkerchief.

_If suspected skull fractured, do not apply pressure to the wound._ A little late for that. How on earth can you not put pressure to a skull fracture that is from a wound that is bleeding that you need to firmly press a cloth to? That made no sense. I noticed my hands were shaking and my breath was coming in short bursts. Not the time to have a panic attack.

"Double D? How long has it been?" Kevin repeated loudly.

My throat caught. "I don't know!"

I must have sounded slightly hysterical, because Kevin responded quickly. "That's fine. Don't worry about it. The ambulance is coming soon anyway."

_Apply ice packs to swollen areas_, my mind whispered. Her eyes were swollen. No ice. They had been like that when we came in. How long ago was that? Oh god, that was a lot of blood.

How could this happen? How?!

"W-What happened, Kevin?" My voice started to shake as much as my hands, I worried that he couldn't understand me through the water and my panic.

"She was drunk," Kevin spat out, his voice shook too, from the cold water most likely.

What?

"What?"

What? She was what? Drunk? But-… What? My brain skittered like a broken record around any semblance of comprehension. The word held less meaning for me at the moment than 'placating' had for Kevin.

"When I called her last night she was at a party and obviously hammered. I thought she would be hung over today, not drunk still! She tripped and hit her head on the side of the table, and knocked over some of the chemicals. I t-t-tried to catch them, but they spilled on me." He paused for a moment, then growled. "Fuck, it's cold."

"Language," I said automatically. As I said it, the sounds of sirens drifted to my ears. They weren't loud enough for Kevin to hear over the water. He snarled. "I think I'm allowed. Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck."

I didn't reply. Ignoring Kevin's soft stream of increasingly more filthy curses, I strained my ears to follow the sirens as they drew closer. At last, just after a panicked thought that they were going to drive right past, I heard the commotion of people outside. People yelled in the hallway as doors banged opened.

"Alright, make way!" the words came clear as I heard footsteps run into the room. A moment later, a man dressed in a dark blue jumpsuit with a medical bag appeared next to me, kneeling uncaringly in the blood.

"You the one that called in?" he asked briskly, moving to put his hands over my own. "Remove your hands now, please." I took my hands away, pressing them against my chest and backed away quickly.

"Yes. There's a kid with some chemical burns in the chemical shower."

"Okay, kid. Jacobson!"

Suddenly the room was full of EMTs, moving quickly with supplies and directing us all to different areas. A female EMT pulled me away, checking my hands and arms.

"It's hers. I'm fine," I tried to say, but she ignored me, checking my pulse and looking into my eyes.

"Your pulse is too fast and you're sweating, but that could be explained by the shock. Is there any place that hurts or feels strange?"

I shook my head. "No, I'm fine. Just a little overwhelmed."

She smiled at me, "I can imagine. I need to go help the others, if you any feel aches, pains, or feel nauseous, you need to go to the hospital, alright? Sometimes the shock will block out the pain until later."

"Adrenaline," I replied, nodding. Patting my shoulder, she left me standing next to the door. Kevin was no-where to be seen and they were just moving Ms. Hafnium onto a stretcher. I wasn't left alone long, a police officer tapped me on the shoulder and drew me from the room. Another female. I wondered if they send the girls to deal with the children because it would remind them of their mothers.

I was shaking again. The policewoman took me to another classroom, the History room, the walls were filled with historical quotes and figures. My gaze moved across them, counting each president, congressman, national leader, and important figure.

"Your name is Edd-ward, right? With two 'd's? How unusual."

"Mix-up at the hospital," I said vaguely. "Dad told them Edd with two because it was strong, Mom said Edward because it was elegant, nurse did both."

"Well, Eddward, I need you to tell me what happened today."

"I-I'm not sure." My hands started to shake again. I held them together tightly in my lap.

"Just tell me what you saw, alright?"

"Well, I, we, Kevin and I, that is, he." I stopped and tried to reorganize my thoughts.

"Take your time," she said, not unkindly.

"I'm supposed to be tutoring Kevin this summer. Some of the lessons required the use of some chemicals that children are not allowed to use unsupervised. Ms. Hafnium was supposed to help during these lessons. That was why we were here today!"

"That's fine," she said soothingly.

I took a deep breath, "Well, when we arrived around 9:38, she looked tired, and didn't remember about the lesson."

The policewoman was writing down what I said, but stopped and smiled at me. "'Around 9:38'?"

"Well, that's when we entered the building. It takes a few minutes to walk down the hall."

"Ah, I see." She scribbled something down then nodded at me to continue.

"She started to set up for the lesson and I went to see another teacher. I was only gone for a few minutes. When I got back, she was still setting up. I was reading something, I don't know for how long. I heard a loud noise and looked up and Ms. Hafnium was on the floor and Kevin was next to her…" I broke off, my chest burning. I bent over, my breath coming short and fast. Shaking violently, I tried to control myself. Not now, not now. Later. I can break down later.

The policewoman ran a hand in circles on my back, probably trying to sooth me, but instead was encouraging the attack. I held up a hand. "P-please, don't." She obeyed, standing and moving away for the few minutes it took for me to recollect myself.

"A-alright." I straightened, my knuckles white from where I gripped my hands together. After the policewoman took her seat in front of me again, I resumed. "I got Kevin to the chemical shower and called 911. I remembered what I learned about what to do in an emergency and kept Ms. Hafnium still and put a cloth to her head. T-there was a lot of blood."

"Yes," she said, her voice soft but calm. "Head wounds tend to bleed a lot, making them look worse than what they are." She put the pad down and held my shoulder in her hand, making me look at her. "Eddward, you did everything right. You did a very good job today."

She had kind eyes, I noticed, sort of a warm hazel. My whole body warmed under the praise from an adult, something I rarely receive.

"Will, will I need to go to the police station or anything?"

Withdrawing her hand, she shook her head. "So long as everything remains as straightforward as it appears, I don't believe so. But I will take your phone number. Shall I call your parents to have them take you home?"

"No, they're both at work right now. I'm staying at Kevin's place, I'll just go home with him, if he's okay."

"If you are sure?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Very well, let's go see how Kevin is then."

She led me down the suddenly huge hallway, it took the same number of steps to reach the doorway as usual, but the path seemed to stretch on for hours. Outside, there was a large crowd of people being restrained by four police officers. It mostly contained adults either off work or unemployed, but the kids of the cul-de-sac were there, drawn by the morbid curiosity sirens bring. I caught sight of Eddy and Ed in the crowd and dropped my head before I could meet their gaze. Fortunately, the policewoman took me to the back of an ambulance facing away from the crowd. In the back of the vehicle, Kevin sat with his legs swinging, his arm covered in white bandages and held with a sling. He appeared to be relaying his accounts to another police officer, this time male. As we approached, the officer glanced up and nodded at us.

"Thank you, Kevin, shall I call your mother?" I heard him say as we covered the last few feet.

Kevin shook his head. "I saw her in the crowd, I'll just go meet up with her." He saw me staring at his arm and explained, "Second-degree burns. Not bad enough to need to go to the hospital."

Relief flooded through me and I nearly collapsed as I sat next to him. "Good."

The police officers waited for a moment as if waiting for more, before Kevin's officer said, "Thank you both. Be sure to contact one of us if there is anything else you remember." He handed me two cards, one for Kevin, I assume. "We'll be right over there if you need anything else." He nodded at us and the two of them walked a ways away to converse amongst themselves. Probably comparing notes.

"You okay, Double D?" Kevin asked presently.

"Yes, " I said, nodding. Neither of us had the courage to look each other in the face. "Does it hurt?"

"Hurts like hell," Kevin confirmed. "They gave me a shot of something, so it's not too bad right now, and said to see my doctor later today for a prescription of pain meds."

"I told the police lady that I was staying at your place today," I admitted suddenly.

Kevin jerked his head towards me, I didn't look at him. "Why?"

Before I could think of something to say, I heard a loud, "Double D!" and was abruptly enveloped in warmth that smelled suspiciously like gravy.

"Ed?!" I yelped, nearly falling backwards at the strength of his hug.

"And Eddy, Double D!" Ed's voice confirmed.

"How on earth did you get back here?" I asked, bewildered.

"We snuck around the other side of the school," Eddy's voice said coolly. I felt a movement to my side. "Get off him, Lumpy."

Ed dragged himself away, beaming. "I'm so glad you're okay, Double D!"

I smiled faintly. "Me too." Glancing around, I saw Kevin had gotten up and moved a little bit away. Eddy looked me up and down then snorted and crossed his arms. "What happened, Double D, and why is _he_ here," he jerked a thumb at Kevin, who sneered.

I thought quickly. "I read about a new elemental isotope called Helium 3 in the paper this morning and was going to ask Ms. Hafnium about it," I invented. "The paper was saying how it would revolutionize the way we look at energy and fueling. Well, it isn't a new isotope per say, it is just extremely rare on earth, usually sought after for it's use in nuclear fusion research. Because it's so rare we usually have to create it in a lab, but it turns out the moon is chalk-full of it! Just think of it, Eddy-"

"I don't care about the moon, Double D," Eddy cut off my rambling. "Why is Kevin here, too?"

Annoyed at his snooping, I glared. "I don't know, Eddy. Maybe he was asking Ms. Hafnium if she knew where the coach was, since it's rather hard to get hold of him during the summer. I didn't _exactly _have time to ask him when Ms. Hafnium fell, Eddy!"

Kevin was staring at me, but I ignored him to increase the ferocity of my glare at Eddy. He broke my gaze and growled. "Fine, then let's go home so you can tell me what happened with Ms. Hafnium."

"No."

"What?" Eddy's head snapped back around to face me.

"No, I still have to give my statement to the officer. Why don't you go home and I _might _meet up with you later."

Eddy bristled. "Might? What are you, too good for us now that you and Kevin had some sort of incident together?"

"That's not it at all, Eddy! I'm just not in the mood to cater to your ego right now."

"My ego? You're trying to talk to me about my ego when you've got _him _standing right there?!" Eddy jerked his hand at Kevin again, who was watching with a small smirk on his face.

"Don't make this about Kevin, Eddy. He hasn't even said anything to you! This is about you and how you refuse to allow me to interact with the people who live around us! Well, I've got news for you Eddy. I'm not a toy. I'll talk to whom I please, and right now it does not please me to talk to you!" I jumped down from the ambulance and walked away. "Come on, Kevin," I said loud enough for Eddy to hear.

"Sure," Kevin said, amusement clear in his tone as he followed me.

"Well, FINE" Eddy yelled after me. "Like I care what you do! Tch! Let's go, Lumpy. Apparently, Double D doesn't need us anymore!"

I nearly stopped at that, but when I hesitated, Kevin bumped into my shoulder and hissed as it jostled his arm. "Ah, sorry, Kevin."

"Don't worry about it, Double D. It was worth it to see the look on Eddy's face." He laughed coldly.

I spun on him. "Let's be clear on one thing, Kevin. This has nothing to do with you, got it? Eddy's just acting like a jerk and I'm not in the mood to deal with it."

He raised a hand as if to ward off my anger. "Hey, don't yell at me. I'm injured here."

Deflating, I nodded. "I'm sorry, Kevin."

We started walking again, heading back to the cul-de-sac. My house, my room in particular, began looking more and more welcome. All I wanted at that moment was to shower and hide in bed for the rest of the day.

"So, Double D," Kevin began, then stopped when I looked at him. He fiddled with his hat, a move I was beginning to associate with him feeling uncomfortable or nervous. "Why did you lie about why we were at school?"

"To Eddy?"

"Yeah, I mean. He's your friend, right?" He sneered a bit at the last few words.

Ignored that, I said, "That's part of the arrangement, right? That I can't tell Eddy and Ed about my tutoring you?"

"That's why? I mean, even after today?"

"Nothing happened today that would negate our agreement." I paused. "I hope Ms. Hafnium is okay."

Kevin shrugged. "She's fine. I heard them talking when I was getting my arm bandaged up. The wound wasn't too bad, she was mostly unconscious because of the alcohol. She's at the hospital for observation though. The police are probably going to charge her with something as well. At the very least, she's gonna get fired."

"Oh, poor Ms. Hafnium."

"Poor nothing!" Kevin snapped, a deep frown appearing on his brow. "She came to school drunk knowing that she would have to use chemicals today. She is incredibly irresponsible, I wouldn't be surprised if she is often tipsy at school considering how often she screws something up."

"Don't say that! You have no proof on that and it'll just spread vicious rumors!"

"I don't care! That woman should not have been put in charge of children! I hope she is fired."

"…I certainly don't think I could look at her the same way again." Blood. I shuddered.

"Hey, you did good today, Double D. I don't think I could've kept my head like that."

"I was panicking the whole time."

"You didn't let it stop you though. It was kinda cool."

I froze. When I looked up Kevin grinned at me. "You know," he continued nonchalantly, starting to walk ahead. "For a dork."

Jerk. I grinned and trotted to catch up with him. "Hey, wasn't your mom back at the school?"

"Yeah, but she saw us leave. She's probably going to talk to the police for a bit."

I looked at his arm. Kevin noticed and shrugged. "She was with me when I was getting wrapped up then went to go talk to Miss. Apparently she was having a bit of a hysterical fit about what happened to us."

"Oh, well I suppose I ought to go see her later."

Kevin made a noncommittal sound, "Probably not, she'll be eye deep in paperwork and phone calls. Give her a call later."

I hated calling people.

"I owe you a jawbreaker," Kevin announced suddenly. "I think after today you should get three, so long as you don't share with those other Eds. They didn't earn them, got it?" He shot me a glare.

"Sure, Kevin. I'll pick them out another time. Right now I just want to go home."

"Sure thing."

We were passing the park just then, it looked as green and simple as when we had left it. It was hard to believe.

"Right, I probably need to wait for Mom here. I don't have my key and she'll probably want to go to get that prescription."

I met his eyes. There was something different about him now, maybe it was pain or stress, but there was that almost fond look back in his eyes. It was the way Eddy sometimes looked when I came up with a scam for him on my own, or when I made a reference to a comic book Ed was reading. Something almost like respect.

Then again, I could be imagining things.

"Very well, Kevin. I'll see you around."

"Next Wednesday for sure," he said.

"Yes. Definitely next Wednesday. Good bye, Kevin."

"See ya, Double D."

With some relief, I went home.

* * *

A/N: Yes. I updated the real chapter on April Fools Day. I hate April Fools Day.


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